I never thought that I would be the type of person to say “I love you” to a lot of people in my life. It always seemed like a romantic intimacy that you share with “that one special person” and maybe your immediate family. More and more, however, I find that I’m saying it to SO many people. And I’ve had the conversation with tons of people that went something like this:
“I only say I love you when I mean it.”
They say this in defense of not saying "I love you" often/to a lot of people. The defense is that when “I love you” is thrown around carelessly, without thought, and too often, it loses its meaning entirely. This is how I thought for quite some time. Saying “I love you” was reserved for special moments with special people. I’ve gotten to a place in my life where I say I love you to many people, and I find that it has brought me great joy because I can see how loved other people feel.
I agree that “I love you” should never be “thrown around carelessly,” but I don’t think that that's a good enough excuse to not say it often. I would argue that you should say I love you to the people in your life as often as appropriately possible. BUT the trick is, you should mean it every time.
I do think that our society has been numbed to the concept of love. I don't think it's because we used to say "I love you" too often. I'm convinced it's because of the people who apathetically express the phrase. We say "I love you" too often... with the wrong intent. That's the key; we say it with the wrong intent.
So if the problem is an apathetic rehearsal of the phrase, then the solution must be a meaningful communication of a deep and true love.
One of the greatest desires of the human condition is to feel loved, to feel like you belong. Simply saying "I love you" with meaning behind it can easily satisfy that desire.
Something to keep in mind when starting to say "I love you" to more people in your life is that there is a social discretionary aspect to saying it. If you’re a normal human being you should know when an appropriate time is and who is an appropriate audience for saying "I love you" to. It will catch people off guard, so make sure you’re saying it with social discretion so they don't feel uncomfortable. The goal is always to make people feel loved; don't be weird about it.
Say I love you to people you love, that's not a secret you should keep from them. Boast in your love for them and be quick to demonstrate it. I promise this will strengthen your relationships and bring a special joy between you and you friends/family/loved ones.
