If you told me even a month ago that I would be ready to put my heart out on the line for someone new, I wouldn't have believed you at all.

It's been about five months since I went through a devastating breakup and, while I'm mostly over it, I still find myself wandering back into that dark place from time to time. Sometimes I still think about her, about what we could have been, and about what I hoped we were meant to be. But there's no denying that, with every passing day, the dark moments are fewer and further between. And for that, I am so endlessly grateful.

If we ever want to love and be loved, heartbreak is a necessary evil.

More likely than not, you'll strike out a few times before you find your one-and-only. Ideally, though, you'll end up with the love of your life and look into their eyes one day and know that every single tear you shed over someone else was worth it. But how can you give yourself that chance at happiness if you won't even get back out on the dating scene?

Pursuing your feelings for someone isn't supposed to be a sure shot. Even if they reciprocate every one of your affections, there would be no point in trying if there weren't some "what-ifs" standing between you two. The thrill of romance is inspired by the endless possibilities that greet us when we dive into a new relationship.

If we knew that a particular person was meant to be our forever love and we'd already found them, we wouldn't be compelled to go out of our way to ensure that the relationship could last since we already know it will. We wouldn't always give our partner our all because we'd know that, regardless of what happened, they would still be ours at the end of the day.

Breakups are some of our best teachers in life. With every failed love affair, you learn more about yourself, about what you look for in a romance, about your expectations for a significant other, and about how you treat your partner once they're yours. Look back upon what went wrong and really think about not only what they could have done better, but about what you could have done better as well.

Take your best friend's advice and let your mother lecture you on how to go about choosing "a more superior mate". Talk yourself into trying again because you've grown a lot with all of the experience and wisdom you've acquired.

Your recovery is all your own, no matter who helped you along the way.

No one can come into your life and repair the damage caused by someone else, nor should you want them to. Because it's difficult work and it takes quite a while to be fully over. It could be a year later and you're waking up beside someone you love dearly, but still, your mind roams and you find yourself wondering where your ex is, or who they're with.

This doesn't make you unfaithful or undeserving of a second chance at love. It shows that you're strong enough to run back out into the world with your arms spread, opening yourself up for what it has to offer you.

I am so blessed to have learned what I know about relationships through my past experiences. I finally feel confident enough in myself to enjoy the company and love of someone new, and it is truly the most liberating feeling.

When you're ready to open up all over again, you'll know. Trust that you know yourself well enough to make the right judgment when the time comes for you to choose whether or not to let someone into your life.