French fries are better than pizza rolls, ice cream and gogurt. French fries might not be better than dogs but I'd argue they're probably better than turtles. They're better than a lot of people some times. Here's why.
1. French Fries are a warm food
There is something about eating warm food after a football game, a concert or event where everything starts to feel right with the world. The chewing process is satisfying and sitting with something toasty in your tummy leaves the whole experience pleasant and memorable, comfortable and filled with thankfulness.
2. They can be eaten cold and still be okay
Everyone loves the fries they find at the bottom of the bag, even if they're several hours old and basically the temperature of a potato at the store.
3. Their salt is appreciated
Sometimes, we interact with people who have a little too much salt for the daily life and average interactions. French fries, on the other hand, have a good amount of salt on them and it's okay! Even if there is too much salt, on a potato that's okay, it just means you'll need some more sodapop afterwords. With people it's uncomfortable and leaves a bad taste in your mouth, but the potatoes make the salt okay.
4. Carbs
I. Love. Carbs. Pasta, donuts and all the potatoes. Seriously, carbs make us happy because they might be related to serotonin levels, and I'm not about to look that gift horse in the mouth.
5. Shareable![]()
A good date? Let's go out and share a bucket of french fries; you'll get me to open up better than if we're out for something fancy, neither of us have to worry about eating too much because it's practically impossible to measure fry intake. Or, if you're a broke college or high school student it can be the cheapest option for money spent versus food available for intake when shared several ways.
6. Not necessary to share them to enjoy![]()
If I order a side of fries, it it not at all implied that I will share them with anyone. I probably won't, to be honest. No one will judge me for this either, it's totally acceptable to eat a large order of fries on your own.
7. Fries are always available
Any restaurant you go to will have french fries of some kind. Maybe it's tater tots, maybe it's "frites," but i can guarantee that any where you go, be it McDonald's or the fanciest of the fancy in New York City, there are fried potatoes to be had there.
8. You can change them, but the original can't be beaten
I would never knock a sweet potato fry, or a crack fry from Hop Cat (highly recommended), or any other type of variation of the classic fry. I love to experiment with flavors-- ask me my favorite breakfast sandwich sometime-- but as much as those things are good, the french fries themselves don't need to be altered. They are still wonderful as plain Janes.
To conclude: Fries> most things. Eat all the fries.
