When I was a little over 9 years old, my Dad and Stepmom made two major life choices for our family: we moved into our first house, and they decided to do foster care for young children. At this age, I had already had experience being a big sister to my half-brother at my mom's house. So the idea of being a "big sister" of sorts at my dads house sounded pretty fun. I was excited to get the first child, I waited and waited and finally on January, 26th, 2004 my stepmom brought home a tiny three day old girl. I was ecstatic, up until now all I had was a brother, so having a "sister" was awesome! I couldn't stay away from her. A couple months later, my parents brought home another little girl, I was excited all over again, because now I would have TWO sisters. This girl was different though, her mother had been addicted to drugs, so she had to get weaned off them. She cried more than the other girl, and she was much more fragile. She got better, and eventually went on to get adopted by some extended family. That was the first of many happy goodbyes.
The first girl got older, she learned to walk and talk, my parents got more kids. I was starting to become a teenager as well, so now everything these kids did was annoying. I couldn't go anywhere without them following me, or being able to hear them crying. My parent's couldn't take me places as often, or if they did we would have to get two, sometimes three little kids ready and loaded in the car. My friends couldn't come over and hang out as easily. I can't say that I didn't like my life like this, but there were definitely times I wished I could just come home from school to a quiet house, not a house filled with kids, crying, and drooling and sneezing.
As I said, I pretty much always accepted that this was my life, it became second nature to me, this was my family and these were my siblings. From 2004 until now my parents have had 19 foster children. Some were more fun than others, some were vocal and loud, some barely ever talked. Some were healthy and strong, others not so much. Some stayed for years, some only for a few days. Each new child had their own story. We got some straight from the hospital, some from other foster homes. All of the children that we had have had happy endings: Some were adopted by family members, some went back to their parents, and some found forever homes with new families. One became my own "real" sister, in August of 2007 my family adopted the first foster girl we ever brought home, who became my sister, Sarah. My family sees and has contact with quite a few of the children that we have had, and it is always great to see how much the kids have grown and progressed while knowing that we helped get them there.
I get asked often how it was growing up like this, and I'm never quite sure how to answer that. It was fun, I gained 19 family members. It was sad, bonding with these kids and then having to let them go. It was frustrating, being a kid and a teenager and having to deal with kids in my space at all times. It was eye-opening, my family has gotten children from all walks of life. I have seen children and families of all demographics and learned to never judge someone off first impressions. But most of all, it was humbling and it was rewarding. I was reminded everyday that I have a house, a family, and a life. I got to share those things with kids weren't as lucky as me. I get to know everyday that my family and I helped 19 kids start their lives. It has taught me to count my blessings regularly and never forget all that is easily taken for granted.
I wouldn't trade my childhood for anything, being the biological child of foster parents has taught me countless life lessons and helped to build my character as an adult. So thank you to my parents, for opening up our home to those less fortunate kids. And thank you to those kids: for being my siblings, for teaching me how to love unconditionally, for teaching me that goodbye isn't always a bad thing. Doing foster care is something I would love to do later in life, and I aim to always raise awareness of how important foster care is. For as much as I appreciate those children, I know they appreciate us just as much, and that is probably the most rewarding part.
