Growing up Greek in America definitely makes for a rather unique upbringing. All the sleepovers at Yiayia's house, roasting a whole freaking lamb in front yard, getting beaten by a wooden spoon, and getting spit on for good luck, all seemed normal to us until....we made friends with the "American" kids. All the traditions we were accustom to our whole lives all of a sudden made us feel like our family was a bunch of lunatics. While all my friends were at boy scouts, I was forced to go to Greek school. My friends were excited to eat ham on Easter, I was ecstatic to watch Papou prep the lamb to go on the spit. All my friends were planning their Saturday night sleep over while I was looking forward to sleeping at Yiayia's house and eating Ouzo candies until I was buzzed. Here are 10 things you are sure to have experienced growing up Greek in America:

1. Your WHOLE family was there. No matter what the circumstances.

Whether it was a sporting event, your Greek school pimata, or your high school graduation; rail, sleet, or snow; they were all there. And as soon as they walked into the room, they made for damn sure that everyone knew it. Students only got four tickets to give to their families for graduation, but my Mom made a some phone calls, wrote a few checks, and snapped some necks, but she made sure that everyone from Nick, Nick, and Niki, was there see me walk across the stage in my cap and gown.

2. Going off to college was basically like stabbing your parents in the heart.

Starting my college search, I knew my choices were very limited. "Why?" you might ask. Because the people that were paying for my tuition wouldn't let me leave the house unless I was a hop, skip, and a jump away from them. When I did end up deciding to leaving, it was the worst day of their lives. And the worst day of my life was when they dropped me off at my dorm crying with me in their arms right in front of my new roommate. I just knew he was sitting there thinking, "Crazy f*cking Greeks."

3. Asking Mom if you could have a sleep over...

Asking my Mom to sleep over at my friends house was like asking to start World War lll. I had to ask on Monday so I had every day of the week before the weekend to argue with her in hopes of it ending in my favor. And let me tell you something.... it never did. Our conversation went something like this

Me: "Mom can I sleep over at Tommy's house please?"

Mom: "Is his family Greek?"

Me: "No...they're not."

Mom: "Hahahahahha, f*ck no, you can't sleep at Tommy's. Go sleep at Yiayia's. She made baklava for you."

4. Your best non-Greek friend wanted to be Greek so bad.

He knew exactly when pastitsio night was and he always made sure he was there with your family, even if you couldn't be. He's been to your house so many times that he calls your mom "Thea." When Yiayia asks about your friends, she always asks about him first, because when he sees her, he runs up to her screaming "Yiayia" in an American accent and gives her a hug. Wanna be Greek.

5. Yiayia giving you money felt like a drug deal.

The whole family knows what goes on when Yiayia tells everyone to come over for dinner. She secretly wanted to give all the grandkids money. She would discreetly call each one to her bed room, and slip us a $50 and whisper, "Go get your self a sandwich." I didn't know they made sandwiches out of gold.

6. Bringing your non-Greek significant other home to the family is one of the most stressful experiences of you life.

Telling your family you're bringing home an "xeno" for them to meet is a huge ordeal. All the anticipation and anxious waiting leads to restless cooking of an unnecessary amounts of food that will just end up being brought home for left overs. Your significant other will ask you, "Will they judge me because i'm not Greek?" And you of course respond with, "No, they would never do that!" But you 100 percent know that they will judge the shit out of them for not being Greek so they better make a good first impression. No Greek likes dry toast.

7. The "mati" was the root off all evil.

If something in your life went wrong, you immediately thought of every person you've crossed paths with in the past month that gave you the evil eye. Oh, you didn't get that internship? The secretary that called your name must have given you the evil eye. You have a cough? There's no way you got sick out of nowhere, that lady behind us at church was staring through your soul. There is currently no medical cure for the "mati", however, there is a spiritual treatment. Just dial 1(800)-976-MATI for professional evil eye removal service by a certified Yiayia. You should be better in no time.

8. You never knew what hunger felt like.

Growing up Greek, I never knew what being hungry was like. To the point where I thought it was a made up word. My life was a constant eating contest. Finished breakfast? Now its time for lunch. Done with lunch? Here's a full platter of spanakopita to snack on before I make 10 pounds of potatoes and full lamb for dinner. And no matter how much weight you gained, you were always too skinny by Yiayia's standards. I didn't know what hunger was until I came to college, and now I wish that I never knew what it felt like.

Dear Mom,

Please send pastitsio.

9. The only booze you could steal from your parent's liquor cabinet was Ouzo.

High school was a constant struggle of finding ways to get alcohol. Some people went the fake I.D. route, and others would ask older siblings or friends. But when times were tough and you didn't have time to run to the liquor store or call a friend for help, your first instinct was to go for your parents liquor cabinet. All the American kids got a wide variety to chose from but when I opened my parents liquor cabinet, I was always disappointed with the sight of bottles upon bottles of Ouzo. I had to cut my losses and go for it even though I knew I would dread every single sip I took. No one likes Ouzo. If you say you do, you're lying to your self.

10. You live for weddings.

Some people say that if you have never been to a Greek wedding, then you have not yet lived. I would consider this statement to be true based off my personal experience. Getting the big news that your cousin had just gotten engaged only meant one thing, there was a big fat Greek wedding on its way. You can't wait to smash plates, throw money all over the dance floor like its worthless, and get spit on by your dad's aunt that you have seen in 10 years because you "got so tall and handsome." There's no better feeling than getting the whole family together to celebrate such a beautiful day in your family's history. Being surrounded with the ones you love most, along good food and drinks, is a recipe for happiness. Watching Papou slam glasses full of Metaxa and dancing the Zeibekiko like he's 30 again also never fails to disappoint.

Even though my experience growing up greek made for a rather unique upbringing, I wouldn't change a thing.

"You should be proud to be Greek"- Gus Portokalos