Growing up, I always wanted to know what it was like living with two parents. I wanted to experience the life of the typical child in any television show with a goofy and lenient dad and a strict but loving mother. I didn't really get to witness it though. When I was 2 years old, my parents got a divorce, and to me at the time it was nothing. I was not able to process what the rest of my life would be like. As I got older I noticed that some kids had both of their parents pick them up from school and carry them on their backs or run up to them smiling, but my mom was the one who smiled while doing both.

When I was around 5 or 6 years old, I simply thought I was the coolest kid on the block because I had two houses; my dad's and my mom's. I spent more time at one, but when it was time I would make my way over to another. As a year went by I realized I would be staying with my mom because I finally understood what divorce actually was. It was finalized and it was very apparent through the constant yelling over the phone and constant tears and signs of stress, denial and guilt across my mother's face. I will say now it tears me apart to speak about my childhood, but the more personal I get, the more you will understand why I would never change the way I was raised for the world.

I didn't have a two-parent household where if my mom said I couldn't do something I would go and ask my dad knowing he would say yes. I also couldn't bring my dad in for parent-teacher conference meetings when my mom was busy. She was always there on time, though. To this day I don't know how she did it, considering all the times I got detention for senseless behaviors.

Anyway, I grew up in quite the fix, since I didn't know much about my father. Anytime I was in school and was asked questions about both my parents, I always felt weird telling people I didn't have a dad. That was before I knew that the proper way to address the situation was to say, "My father no longer lives with me." As if that made it any better. I also fell into the issue of feeling guilty for my parents not being together. For some reason, I used to think my existence was the result of my parents not being together. It doesn't make sense, but sometimes you can't help but wonder why it happened once you were born and not your other sibling.

I always felt extremely jealous of people who had both their parents but complained about them or seemed ungrateful for something that many kids wanted but could not have. I was dying to know what it was like to have both my parents together, happy, smiling and ready to move on from their past. I wanted to experience family trips and vacations, family dinner, family conversations; and I wanted to see my mom and dad physically together, holding hands and being genuinely happy. But now as I reach my first year of adulthood, I know that that is not the life that I want.

I would not have had the perfect example of what a single hardworking mother looks like, in case I have to be strong the way she did when she raised me and my brother. I would not have had the relationship with my older brother that I do now. Growing up in a single-parent household was hard, but my brother was my father figure. He taught me how to fight, how to dance, how to come up with quick comebacks -- and most importantly he taught me my worth as a young lady in a world full of hate and labels.

I most definitely would not have understood how to truly forgive people for their mistakes if my mother was not there to constantly remind me that hatred and self-loathing will hold you back from your blessings and your full potential. I would not have been inspired the way I am now by the group of mothers I have, who support me as strong women and leaders. I also wouldn't have had the love for my family that I do now. Most importantly, I wouldn't know why it is so important to know your father had I grown up with one.

Growing up in a single-parent household opens up your eyes. Not only does it allow you to truly love people for who they are and not what they do, but it brings you 10 times closer to those who grew up in the same environment as you. It makes you understand the importance of family, loyalty and genuinely honest love. As easy as it could have been for my mother to give up on my brother and I, she didn't, and for that I love her -- because not everyone is as lucky as I am. She is my hero forever and always.

All together it was a difficult time. But it allowed me to view my world much differently than others would. Many people say, "Your mother is your mother; she can only be a mother." But I say that's complete bullshit! My mother has been my mother and my father for almost 20 years now. Yes, I have a father, but I was raised solely by my mother. And for this reason alone, I have learned to love myself the way I do; I have learned to be grateful for the people I have in my life and those that will soon enter. Most importantly, I have learned to love my father for him and not his past. Thank you.