Growing Apart From Your High School Best Friend

Growing Apart From Your High School Best Friend

How things have changed and why that is okay


At the beginning of your senior year of high school, you are not really thinking about where you are going to be the next fall. I mean yes, you have applied to colleges all over the country, and yes you have your top choice, but let's be honest, what you are really worried about is the football game on Friday or what you and your best friends are going to do on the weekend. Up until about the middle of March, everything in your life is going good, you can not even begin to imagine your life without your best friends every day. Then, it is time to decide where you are going to be in about five short months.

Once you and all of your friends have decided where you are going to go to college and you have paid those deposits, reality really sets in. You realize you will not have your best friend with you every day and the distance is going to be hard, but you think you can make it work, so you forget about it for the time being.

Then it is the graduation day. The day you have looked forward to for four years now, but when it is finally here, all you wish you could do is rewind. When the day is over, and you are sitting there with your best friends, it still seems as if nothing is going to change, when really it already has.

Throughout your years of middle and high school, you have had many best friends, but one BEST friend. You know this person, almost as well as you know yourself, they are basically a part of your family, and you are a part of theirs. The summer after you graduate is like every other summer before, except with a little more freedom. This summer is the summer, where you get to really make your own decisions and make your own rules. This is the summer that really, everything changes.

You and your best friend are still close, but you have become closer to a few other people as well. Things with boys start getting a little more serious and sometimes, you may have to choose between spending time with a boy or spending time with your best friend. We have all chosen a boy over a friend at some point in time, and being the friend on the other side hurts. So although this summer is one of the best yet, it is a little difficult to process the change at the same time.

Then it is the night before you leave for college, and you and all of your friends are hanging out and saying your goodbyes. Everyone has left and it is just you and your best friend, crying in each other's arms. At that moment, you think that this will be a forever type of friendship. Then you leave.

Once you get to college, you are making new friends and learning new things, and so is your best friend at another school. Days go by and you barely speak, and then it is weeks. You see each other once or twice while you are home on breaks, and then neither of you end up making the effort for even that. It takes a while to adjust to not having that person in your life anymore, but you do it. You see them on social media, and that is it. You feel like you do not know that person anymore, and while that is a hard concept to swallow, you learn how to do it. Because even though it seems like they are doing great, making new friends, and have replaced you... you have done the same and that is okay.

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To My Best Friend Who Taught Me What True Friendship Is, I Can't Thank You Enough

"To the person who will love you endlessly, love her with kindness and understanding."

Dear Best Friend,

You have been a part of my life for quite some time now. You have seen my good, bad, and ugly sides and have stuck by my side through it all. I don't know if I could ever find the words to truly thank you for everything your friendship has given me, but I am definitely going to try.

Our lives have taken some twist and turn these past few years, but we have stayed strong through it all.

Thank you for judging me just the right amount.

Throughout our friendship, I have made some very questionable decisions. A lot of people would say "thanks for never judging me," but I feel like everyone needs a best friend who's going to tell them how it is, to tell them when they are about to make a bad decision or how to avoid something worse from happening. You have always told me how it is (even when I don't always want to hear it), but I know that I can come to you whenever I need someone to set me straight.

You're always down to do nothing with me.

I think that you are the one person that I can call up to hang out and do absolutely nothing with and have a good time. From the nights sitting in and playing card games to ordering Chinese food and watching an entire Netflix series while I dance around with the cat: I know that we could do anything, and nothing together and it would be fun.

But also, you're always down to get lit with me.

I swear one day we will be two old moms at a bar drinking vodka crans and laughing about the stupid shit our husbands and children do. You're always down to go out and have a good time. Even if everyone else we're with is miserable, we find a way to laugh at ourselves.

You are one of the few constant things in my life.

I've lost a lot of friends in my life, but you have stayed by my side through everything. I can't remember the last time we actually fought about anything, but even when we do we can't stay mad at each other for more than a day. I know we will be in each other's lives until we literally keel over.

I want you yo know that you're the strongest person I know.

You've dealt with things that not many people go through ever in their life. You have always been so mature, and you handle everything with grace. You inspire me every day with your goals and successes and I am so proud of you and all of your accomplishments.

Above all else, you deserve the world.

It's so easy to get caught up in your own mind and think that you deserve the things that happen to you, but please know that the only thing you deserve is happiness. Please settle for nothing short of that. It may take a bit to find your happiness, but I will be there every step of the way. You're a remarkable human being, and I want nothing but the best for you.

To the person who will hold your heart someday, please do not break it. To the person who may wrong you, you will regret it forever. To the person who will love you endlessly, love her with kindness and understanding.

You, my best friend, future bridesmaid, godmother of my children, the person to bail me out of jail, the one who lets me cry on their couch for twelve hours,

I love you.

I will cherish our friendship forever. Thank you for being you.

Love always,

Your best friend.

Cover Image Credit: Adriana Ranieri

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Being The Last Friend To Turn 21 Isn't ALL Bad

All your friends have turned 21, but that is okay


You may think being the last one out of your friend group to turn twenty-one is the worst thing in the world, but in all honesty, it doesn't have to be. One of the biggest perks is that everyone of your friends can go out to the bars with you on your birthday. All the people who turn twenty-one first have to wait for people to be able to go out with them, but you get to celebrate your birthday with all of your friends.

Another huge reason you should feel okay with being last to turn twenty-one is thinking about all the money you are saving. The bars are expensive. When you don't go to the bars you are saving so much money because an average bar drink is about seven dollars. This being said seven dollars multiple times a night, multiple nights a week really adds up, so you are going to have to budget your money better.

You don't have to be the one to buy alcohol for everyone else. Having a ton of people ask you to buy them alcohol must get annoying at a point, and if you're the youngest out of your friends, no one will be asking you to do liquor store runs for them because they can all go already for themselves.

The biggest reason is that you can enjoy being young. You should still continue to enjoy going to house parties and just being able to hang out with friends without having to go to the bars. Spend these months before you turn twenty-one just being able to enjoy life without feeling obligated to go out to the bars all the time. You have a great excuse when you don't want to drink on a weekday to just stay in. This being said it will be your turn to turn twenty-one soon.


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