Today marks three days since I walked across the stage, was handed my diploma, and most importantly - didn’t trip and fall.

So now begins the summer after graduation, which according to the movies is supposed to be legendary, yet instead of being swept away by upcoming plans and pre-college stress I cannot help but think "What could I have done differently?". I cannot help but wonder how my experience compares to others and if in the past fourteen hundred sixty-one days I made mistakes big enough to "ruin" this experience.

Maybe the truth about high school is it is a learning experience in which mistakes can only add to. The classes I took stuck (hopefully), and the knowledge I gained got my through all my finals, 3 AP exams, and 2 college classes, but it is hard to remember my accomplishments when I think about the accomplishments that could have been if I would have just tried a little harder.

If I would have just put in a few extra minutes, just reviewed my paper one more time or if I had just made the right choice and avoided the pain that I caused both myself and others. As my three hundred and fifteen peers and I lined up that day for the graduation ceremony I could not help but look around at everyone's chords - marks of their accomplishments and wonder if I could have tried harder. If I could have pushed myself a little farther, gotten my GPA up to something more extraordinary, or practiced my instrument more and made it farther in my musical opportunities.

All these thoughts and feelings have lingered like a black cloud raining over the summer fun of the past three days. Maybe these thoughts are the result of a school system that put students against each other, fighting for the best rank or a better GPA than their peers.

Maybe these thoughts are the result of my own guilt, of knowing that I could have done better had I put the time in and not procrastinated project after project. Or maybe these thoughts are a result of my own fears, of not having enough accomplishments under my belt, in comparison to my peers. Or maybe I need more time to think, it has only been 3 days!

What I do know about my days in high school is that through the tears, stress, and fun I have grown in ways that I could never have imagined. I have never been more myself than I am right now, pouring my thoughts out into this article. Every day I gain another experience, and every day another experience may change an aspect of me and my personality. All the mistakes I made are a part of who I am, except maybe falling up the stairs all four years of high school - I did not learn much about myself from those experiences.

In comparison to freshman year I have become more confident and at this moment in time, I am proud of who I am. So maybe the most important part of high school wasn't the classes, the teachers, the mistakes, or the good times. Maybe the most important part of high school was learning how to be okay with yourself. Exploring your likes and dislikes through classes and hobbies, learning what you need in a friend and how to have healthy friendships, and coming out of high school with a goal for the future. My freshman year of high school I had no idea what my ideal job was, much less what I wanted out of life, and even though an idea of a career is still up in the air, I have found that every day and every experience has brought me a little bit closer to what I want out of life - to be myself and to be happy.