I don’t get sick. I mean, yeah, I get headaches sometimes and very occasionally I’ll get a little cold, but I don’t usually let it slow me down. Besides that, I’ve had strep twice (once when I was a kid, once at Thanksgiving four years ago), the flu once (Christmas three years ago), and pneumonia once (three weeks ago). That’s how often I get sick. When I’m that sick, I’m stuck in bed for a few days, and I go stir crazy every time. Now this case of pneumonia was a little odd because I had it for almost a week before I went to the doctor--the emergency room, to be specific. I started feeling it on a Monday, and I was traveling that week, so I just sucked it up and lived my life anyway. The following Sunday, I made it home, and within a few hours, I was having some trouble breathing. As breathing is essential to life, I decided that it was time to be concerned, so I went to the emergency room and hung out there for about five hours. They told me I had pneumonia, so I went home and slept for a couple of days.

Now, during the whole week when I was just dealing with it, I had a nasty cough. When I say “nasty,” you need to understand that I was barely eating because I was afraid that I would cough so hard it wouldn’t stay down (sorry). I’ve been wanting to lose weight, which I did, but that wasn’t really what I had in mind. This particular issue (not eating) wasn’t really all that problematic. The difficulty arose when I tried to speak. I couldn’t make it through a twenty-second conversation without having to turn around and cough until I couldn’t breathe. I realize now that I really should have done something sooner than I did, but what’s done is done.

Now, let me explain something to you: I don’t stop talking. Multiple people have agreed that I have two settings, asleep and talking. I think I must just really enjoy hearing myself talk because I don’t shut up, y’all. I’m somewhat annoying, but I have friends, and I don’t think many people really strongly dislike me--I hope they don’t, so I’ve never worried much about how much I talk, but I was struck by something when I was unable to carry on a conversation. It’s kind of nice to just listen. Yes, sometimes it’s still fun to be a part of the conversation, and sometimes people are dumb and painful to listen to, but I sorta like being the outsider. You don’t even have to really listen. Don’t talk and just be. It’s such a foreign thing to me, but I sure do like it.

This isn’t to say that I’ve stopped talking so much. I’ve tried and it isn’t working out very well. For me, I have to consciously choose to hold my tongue when there’s no need for me to speak. I definitely think about it more now, and I’m much more aware of when I talk and how necessary my words are, but, no, I have not managed to follow my own advice yet. It’ll be a hard thing to learn to do, but I want to learn. My words will be so much more valuable when there are fewer of them. Others will listen more closely when I talk if I don’t talk so much. I’ll hear and listen more and be able to think about others and what they have to say, rather than about me and my thoughts. I’m not going to stop talking altogether (mainly because I honestly don’t think I have the willpower to make myself do that), but I want to give silence the attention that it deserves. Though I’m still trying to apply this to my own life, I encourage you to try to do the same. Chances are that you don’t talk nearly as much as I do, so this should be easier for you. Either way, at least think more about when you speak and when you are silent. I’m sure you’ll be glad you did.