As the year winds down with only a few more weeks left in the wonderful city of Tuscaloosa, it’s been pretty prevalent lately that I reflect on my first year here. It has been quite a ride, a whirlwind of experiences that I really almost wish I could relive.
Freshman year, I can honestly say, has been the most life-changing year yet, as you might expect. There were new freedoms for me, choices I had to make on my own, mistakes made, triumphant accomplishments and a whole lot of growth. My experience has been one of a kind, and it has been far from perfect.
While I’ve definitely had some trials within my faith that I’ve had to work to overcome (and I am still working to overcome), I feel that I’ve seen the Gospel, the true words and teachings of Jesus, so much here at Alabama in every single thing I’ve done. This is what God intends — He wants us to see everything through the lens of Christianity, and it sure does make life a lot more joyful this way.
In high school, I was surrounded by a group of friends who helped me grow substantially in my faith. We all grew together and encouraged each other in the most positive of ways. When I got to college, this whole new world of different people and temptations really kind of scared me. I had never ever been peer pressured in my life to do anything harmful or super against my morals. I could see the devil lurking in every corner as he tried to convince me that my morals really meant nothing. But God was there, and when I did fall to these temptations, He was with me to forgive me, teach me and help me grow up.
You see, this is what I’ve realized as I’ve been here the past eight months of my life: college isn’t real. I know that sounds so weird, but really, college is just a fantasy land of every single opportunity to do every single thing you’ve ever even thought about doing. Sure, it’s a whole lot of fun. I love going out with my friends on the weekends (or weekdays … guilty) and I love having social events with different groups of people on campus. But in this society with such a lack of innocence, we are told that promiscuity and lack of moralistic values in our heads and in our hearts is perfectly okay. In fact, it’s encouraged to forget everything your life in the church or in your family has taught you; instead, just conform to the ways of the world.
It says go home with that random guy you met 20 minutes ago, throw back a few more shots, take that random pill and make as many mistakes as you want because, in the end, someone else has done something worse, right? Now, not every college works like this, but the essence of college, the so-called “best four years of your life,” is to get it all out and act childish before the real world hits you. Sin is literally everywhere.
By the grace of God I’ve beat it, simply because I fell into this trap of fantasy. What?! How can falling for these temptations that are totally against what the Lord intends for His children be a victory? Both in Psalms and Romans it is written: “We face death all day long; we are as sheep to be slaughtered.” Temptations come our way and we succumb to all of these things that we regret later on, but God’s love is eternal and it is forever. This is why Jesus died for us. Throughout his life and his ministry on Earth, Jesus teaches his followers the truth of his Father — ultimately, he dies so that we, these college screw ups, can have eternal life. That just astounds me.
Probably the most substantial words to describe this experience (besides those written in the Bible, of course) come from the deep, meaningful minds of Mumford & Sons. They write in “Tompkins Square Park,” from their latest album, words that perfectly describe the human condition and the hard truth about it:
“But no flame burns forever, oh no
You and I both know this all too well
And most don't even last the night.”
These “flames” signify the sins we commit that bring us short-term fulfillment. Sure, it can feel nice to flirt it up all night, or it could be fun to drink a few more drinks to heighten your confidence, but in the end, how long will that flame last? How long will that be fun? Will it be worth what you put yourself through?
It takes awhile to figure out that the only thing that can really bring contentment and joy in life is having Jesus guide your way. He forgives you. He takes the burdens from you. He loves you unconditionally, despite all of the times you screw up. It’s so hard in college to remember what the real world is like, and it’s so hard to just let go and let God handle all of the burdens you have.
Often, we put the shame on ourselves and learn to deal with it, but we don't have to because God is the one who wrote our stories out ahead of time, knows everything we will do and will think, and sent His son down to Earth to die for us. The mistakes we make help us learn more about ourselves, and the hard times we go through draw us closer to Him. It's a continuous process, and He carries us the whole way.
College is a time of drastic change and imperfection; that’s what makes it such a beautiful, crucial time period. The fact that sin is everywhere reminds us how imperfect we are and encourages us to go straight to the cross to repent of our transgressions, humbling ourselves before God and becoming even more astounded by his unfailing grace.
Regardless of circumstance, God is always there. He is loving and supportive and omniscient. You are saved through Him, and you are loved unconditionally. Nothing can ever change that.
