Saying Goodbye

Saying Goodbye

Let's Say Goodbye to Our Loved Ones the Right Way
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There are two types of goodbyes - the type where the people are upset to leave each other and the type where the people are very happy to part ways. This article is about the goodbyes that make your heart constrict because you don't want to leave the other person... or you don't want them to leave you.

For such a small word, it has a huge impact on people. Some people like saying goodbye because it gives them a sense of control over the sad situation. Others dislike the word because they know (from past experiences) that their friend, roommate, son, or husband might not make it home that night due to a traffic accident, a drive-by shooting, or something just as horrific and unpredictable. Some of my friends prefer saying the words "See ya later" as a substitute because it hurts less.

But saying goodbye doesn't have to hurt if you say goodbye right.

Please end your conversations with love. We get so angry at each other over matters that lose importance when we acknowledge what actually matters in life. What matters to me is letting people I care about know that every single time we are together. Sometimes, I fail miserably at this because I make the wrong choices with my explosive feelings.

For example, in high school I remember getting really mad at a guy-friend of mine over how he judged me for living out my faith. I remember yelling at him in my garage one time, wanting to get through his thick skull that he was hurting me, and I slammed a door in his face. (I bet some of my friends are laughing at this, wondering how this version of Brooke is even possible. My only response to that is I've changed a lot since high school.)

But seriously, what if that had been our last conversation? What if he died, and my livid face was what he pictured of me in his last moments instead of our memories of admiring mansions we will never afford to buy, snacking on popcorn and watching a sports documentary, or giggling while we shoot basketballs in my driveway?

People will say things that make us swoon, become angry, and think more deeply about what actually matters in life. No matter what, leave each conversation with a heartfelt goodbye. I hope it is only a "See ya later" situation, that you will actually see each other again. I hope that my friends leaving right now for St. Louis, Texas, Colorado, Milwaukee, and more are going to stay safe enough so I can see their beautiful smiles again, hear their lovely voices again, and joke about our goofy shenanigans again. Leave them with a hug, your favorite memory of your time with them, an inside joke, or a kiss on the cheek. Say goodbye right, and it won't hurt as much.


Let me take you down memory lane for all the goodbyes that we have probably said sometime in our lives:

~At our first sleepover at a friend's house, we had to say goodbye to our parent(s).

~On the first day of daycare, our parent(s) tearfully gave their precious kid over to the care of someone else.

~Our first day of school. I was so pumped for kindergarten, I think that made my mom extra sad. I just wanted to puzzle with my new friends, okay? Plus there was a bubble machine outside, it was a very festive occasion for me.

~Saying goodbye to a middle school classmate because the job one of the parents had moved the friend away from you.

~Our departure to college (if that's the route you took after high school). It was liberating, but also very intimidating.

And if we haven't already, soon we might start saying goodbye to friends who move to different states/countries, our parents if we get married, or older family members who pass away. My best advice is to say goodbye right, which means letting all the small things that get in the way of love disappear from our conversations.


One more piece of good news. Our technologically advanced age offers plenty of ways to stay in contact with each other even when we aren't in person with our friends and family members. Some people had to wait for the Pony Express to get their mail. We only have to restart the wifi, which doesn't take long... most of the time. So really, we have lucked out in this century. I guess goodbyes don't have to be so bad after all.

Cover Image Credit: Remi Walle

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8 Reasons Why My Dad Is the Most Important Man In My Life

Forever my number one guy.
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Growing up, there's been one consistent man I can always count on, my father. In any aspect of my life, my dad has always been there, showing me unconditional love and respect every day. No matter what, I know that my dad will always be the most important man in my life for many reasons.

1. He has always been there.

Literally. From the day I was born until today, I have never not been able to count on my dad to be there for me, uplift me and be the best dad he can be.

2. He learned to adapt and suffer through girly trends to make me happy.

I'm sure when my dad was younger and pictured his future, he didn't think about the Barbie pretend pageants, dressing up as a princess, perfecting my pigtails and enduring other countless girly events. My dad never turned me down when I wanted to play a game, no matter what and was always willing to help me pick out cute outfits and do my hair before preschool.

3. He sends the cutest texts.

Random text messages since I have gotten my own cell phone have always come my way from my dad. Those randoms "I love you so much" and "I am so proud of you" never fail to make me smile, and I can always count on my dad for an adorable text message when I'm feeling down.

4. He taught me how to be brave.

When I needed to learn how to swim, he threw me in the pool. When I needed to learn how to ride a bike, he went alongside me and made sure I didn't fall too badly. When I needed to learn how to drive, he was there next to me, making sure I didn't crash.

5. He encourages me to best the best I can be.

My dad sees the best in me, no matter how much I fail. He's always there to support me and turn my failures into successes. He can sit on the phone with me for hours, talking future career stuff and listening to me lay out my future plans and goals. He wants the absolute best for me, and no is never an option, he is always willing to do whatever it takes to get me where I need to be.

6. He gets sentimental way too often, but it's cute.

Whether you're sitting down at the kitchen table, reminiscing about your childhood, or that one song comes on that your dad insists you will dance to together on your wedding day, your dad's emotions often come out in the cutest possible way, forever reminding you how loved you are.


7. He supports you, emotionally and financially.

Need to vent about a guy in your life that isn't treating you well? My dad is there. Need some extra cash to help fund spring break? He's there for that, too.

8. He shows me how I should be treated.

Yes, my dad treats me like a princess, and I don't expect every guy I meet to wait on me hand and foot, but I do expect respect, and that's exactly what my dad showed I deserve. From the way he loves, admires, and respects me, he shows me that there are guys out there who will one day come along and treat me like that. My dad always advises me to not put up with less than I deserve and assures me that the right guy will come along one day.

For these reasons and more, my dad will forever be my No. 1 man. I love you!

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To The Best Friend Every Girl Should Be Blessed Enough To Have

You definitely deserve all the love.

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I have not written this letter, but it has been on my list of "to write" for forever. She keeps asking when I will write one about her and every time I tell her, soon.

Well here it is. The truth on why it took so long? No words seem to do everything justice. No matter how I put them or how I want them to sound, the page always makes them look weird and they always sound lame.

But finally, here it is. Best friend, this one is for you.

First and foremost I will start with a holy cow. We have been best friends for only a short time because who knew your "in school friend" from all those math classes would actually turn into this? We put off hanging out outside of school for years, and finally, after suffering through all that algebra we decided enough was enough.

I wish we had sooner.

I wish I had gotten more time with you before we both moved away to college - but ill take whatever time I get with you because well… you're incredible.

Thank you.

Thank you for finally agreeing to hang out with me.

Thank you for listening to every rant ever - whether it was a paragraph long text, a 2 hour FaceTime call or an hour-long car ride.

Thank you for ordering planners with me and spending nights decorating them with me (we are such losers).

Thank you for letting me become a part of your family.

Thank you for going to Friendly's, IHOP and Target at the most ungodly hours.

Thank you for encouraging me in everything I do, and stopping me from making bad decisions.

Thank you for telling me the truth, despite if it hurt me or not, I know now you will never lie about your feelings towards someone (LOL).

Basically, thank you for everything you have done for me. You have made me a better person and you encourage me to be my best self every single day.

Moving on I want to make it clear how incredibly proud of you I am. I love getting texts from you about your love for your classes, and how you want to be president of this club and president of that. How you help out kids, and how you host events. I love hearing about your major and the classes you are so incredibly excited to take. Watching you be so passionate about what you are doing and becoming makes me want to feel the same way in everything I do.

I hope someday my kids are your students because, in your hands, I know they can change the world.

Last but not least, I love you. And you're stuck with me.

Love,

Your forever number one fan

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