We’ve been friends for a while, but I have always refused to notice the inevitable. My loved ones and other friends could always see it, but I decided to look past all the times you’ve used me and ignored me, insisting that you would be there for me when I needed it. Sadly, I must say it now: I was very wrong.
Over the years, I have had emergencies, crises and milestones. However, it never fit your schedule to be there for me. “I’ll catch up with you next time” was always a common excuse. Slowly, too slowly, I realized that I was not a priority to you, and our friendship meant very little to you if you couldn’t Instagram it. I offered you nothing except unfailing friendship, acceptance and forgiveness. Now, it’s time to say goodbye.
I can no longer offer you what I thought you wanted. I can’t be your back-up plan for when your more enticing plans fall through. I cannot be a tag along when you feel guilty for not wanting to spend time with me alone. I would love to say that we’ve had “quality” time as friends over the years, but I’m not so sure anymore. Was I simply a ride or a cover for your parents in high school? The question will always be there: what can I offer you? How does my friendship elevate your social status?
The truth is it doesn’t enhance your social status, but you will never meet someone who would drop everything for you if you needed it. Maybe that was my weakness the whole time. Maybe I was too willing to be there for you or too forgiving after every time you hurt me. But that’s what I thought real friends do.
So here it is, goodbye to my “friend.” We had some good laughs and those will always be treasured when I begin to miss our friendship. I don’t know if you’ll ever realize it, but you have lost someone who genuinely cared about you.
The friend who cared too much