I am no longer a Citadel cadet. I am a Citadel alumna. Those two sentences still feel odd as I type them out. With four years of hard work and determination, it all came to a close with my graduation ceremony.
So here is my cliche alumnus love letter to the school that made me who I am today.
The Citadel made me realize my strength; I was so much stronger, emotionally and physically, than I ever realized.
Physically, I was pushed until I felt like I was going to black out. There were days when my arms and legs felt like jelly. There were times when I puked while still running. But being pushed made me realize just how far I could take my body, and it was a lot farther than I ever thought. Now that I'm not a knob, I don't need those people yelling at me and encouraging me. Thanks to them, I can push myself.
Me on Recognition Day 2013.
Emotionally, knob year, and even as a senior, I was put under tremendous amounts of stress. Unlike most schools, it's not just classes I have to worry about. I had to balance class, drill, keeping my room clean, making sure my uniform was on point, remembering and attending meetings, parade, formations and physical training before the sun even comes up. Add that to the fact that I was an NCAA athlete and an officer in two clubs, my schedule was quite packed. So when I'm outside of these gates, I can handle stress like it's nothing. Bosses yelling at me? No problem, I've got this.
The Citadel provides you every opportunity to succeed academically. I know if I had attended a "normal school," I would not have done nearly as well. The Citadel realizes the "freedom" that comes with being a college student and pushes us to succeed with mandatory study sessions if your GPA is below a certain level, punishments for skipping class, Evening Study Period, and an amazing Academic Support Center.
The Citadel Military Living History Society taught me how to be a better leader and how to treat my subordinates: Never have them stand facing the sun. Always let them eat before you. Praise in public, critique in private. Always be a gentleman or a lady. All of this was on top of the awesome fun of shooting off six-pound canons for a crowd of spectators.
The Citadel has pushed, almost aggressively, for community service. Since being at The Citadel, I have gone to underfunded schools, a therapy riding program, and a homeless shelter to volunteer with The Citadel, as well as going out and doing volunteer work with my rifle team. The school was incredibly accommodating to me leaving campus for my internship with the VA where I was actively helping our Veterans.
The friends I have made at this school are a bond that I can never put into words. They sat with me while I cried over the loss of a family member, picked up me when I needed rides, sacrificed their own free time because I needed them, or something as simple as bringing me food or coffee when I needed it, and I have done the same for them. The loyalty and love I feel for these people will carry over for the rest of our lives, and no distance can change that.
The Citadel created a strong bond even for those people I was never friends with. I have thrown myself into fights, both figuratively and literally, that I was not even a part of, because I was watching fellow female cadets being harassed. I will start conversations with random people I meet outside of these gates just because they are or were cadets. Unlike at other schools, I have never felt threatened for my safety. At this school, I have seen some of the nastiest sides of people. I have been called names I will never repeat, and I have had rotten food thrown at door, but I have also seen the greatest love. Take a Southern Baptist female from Georgia and an atheist male from Washington and throw them together. At other schools, you would have quick made enemies, but The Citadel forces us to look past those titles and work together to survive. A bond of brotherhood will emerge. While those two may never see eye to eye, at the very least they will respect each other, and at the most? A strong friendship that no controversial viewpoint can shake. I am friends with people that I disagree with on almost every viewpoint, people that I would never have even spoken to if I went to a different school. And it has open my eyes and changed the way I think.
I have seen bad leadership at this school. I will never deny that, but I am grateful for it. I have had great leaders who I wish to emulate, but the bad leaders have shown me how to not act, and it may have been things I never would have thought of if I had not seen it firsthand. I took their mistakes and learned from it.
With the controversies that have come out this year, I will say that people are as different and varied as the colors of a rainbow. I am not here to throw out judgments, but merely to say that we are not all carbon copies of a perfect leaders. We are learning. We fail. We stand back up and try again. The Citadel has done so much good this year, do not let it all go to waste. Remember that there is still good behind these gates.
The Citadel doesn't breed hate, nor does it breed leaders. It gives us a choice. As a cadet, you will become great, and it is up to you to decide if you will take your greatness and use it for good or evil.
So thank you, Citadel for all you have done for me. Now it's my turn to live as a Citadel Woman everyday.
Me on Graduation Day 2016.
