Since I only have a week left of my first study abroad experience, the goodbyes are lurking everywhere on my “emotional events” radar. With so little time left to prepare, I decided to come up with a list for those of us who hate saying, “See you later” or any other euphemism one can put in place of a horrible, wretched goodbye. Whether or not you find these tips helpful (I’m not really sure they are meant to be), maybe they will impart unto you some wisdom.
- Go hide in your bed and watch at least 2 episodes of a Netflix show of your choice.
The most important part of the goodbye is a 90 minute denial session. Chances are if you are watching the last episode of the second season of Dr. Who, you’ll be more prepared for saying the goodbye that has been looming over your head.
2. Make a short list of things you need to do or things you have to tell the person who you are saying goodbye to.
Sometimes goodbye’s are easier when you are more organized because you can acknowledge that the goodbye is just a step in the process of getting things done. Sometimes logic is a beautiful thing because you are able to deny your human emotions for a while by keeping your mind busy. It sounds cold, but it’s actually effective.
3. Don’t think about it
This is perhaps the hardest part of the goodbye process besides for the farewell itself. Sometimes you just have to push the idea of leaving or being left away. For a lot of us, it’s never that easy. If I am really upset about saying goodbye to someone, I usually try to condition myself to think of something else in the place of the impending separation. For example, instead of thinking of the word “good-bye” one could replace it with “good-pie” and immediately you will be salivating thinking about your grandmother’s apple pie inside of the heart-wrenching separation that is about to take place.
4. Rip it off like a Band-aid
This is my personal favorite method of denying my feelings. Make it quick. I like to go with the hallmark card line, “I’ll see you again soon, but for now, take care.” It’s generic and you’re not pouring your heart out, which could send you into an emotional break down. Rush to the goodbye. Don’t linger. Lingering sucks. When I said goodbye to my boyfriend before I went off to college he said, “Okay, see you soon.” And then the tears came and he said, “Please leave.” I got the point. When the tears come that’s when you dip, and you dip fast before causing more unwanted torture.
5. But don’t leave it at that
With goodbyes, you can’t let them be final, even if they are, for your own sanity’s sake. You have to make future plans. There are people I haven’t seen since high school, to whom I said, “It’s not goodbye, just see you later.” Still haven’t seen them. Maybe the high school five year reunion will change that. Who knows. Just make plans, even if they aren’t realistic. Human’s can’t deal with finality, why do you think death bothers us so much? Sorry that’s dark, but you get the point.
