Once, as I drove home from work, I saw a chicken cross the road. Its a testament to how crappy of a day I was having that I found that hysterical.
If you're like me, you probably grew up being told to "love one another" and be kind to all you meet, no matter who they are. While this is a wonderful way to live in theory, putting it into practice is a whole different story. What do you do when you meet someone who's essentially good, but still unbearable?
When you get a new job, the first thing that happens is someone has to show you the ropes. At my current job, I felt I had gotten the routine down pretty well after a week. But 11 months have passed now and my trainer is still in the room, hovering over me, stepping on my toes, and teaching me stuff he's already told me a thousand times before.
You see, my trainer is the kind of person who's accustomed to being the underling. He's always been the one taking orders rather than delivering them, and he's good at that (I mean that in a good way). He's very respectful to his superiors and humble enough to own up to his mistakes when he's made them. He's actually a nice person, in general, sometimes going out of his way to try to boost my confidence. But having someone who is less experienced than him, who is essentially his underling is a new experience for him, and I get the sense that he's enjoying it too much.
My trainer is the first person I've met that I don't think I'll ever really get along with. He's a good person, but he has character quirks that make him difficult to be around for extended periods of time and no one has to be around him longer than me. It makes It very difficult to like him. So, I've had to learn to be more assertive and stand up for myself more so he'll learn to stop accidentally walking all over me and treating me like a child (and I have to manage this while also being gentle. My trainer may be obnoxious, but he's also very sensitive. Being too rough with him would hurt his feelings and leave them hurting for a long time). It's very frustrating.
I've been trying for months to find some redeemable qualities in this situation. The way I've had to change in order to cope, becoming more assertive and a little led shy, is a good thing. In the end, I suppose he's also forcing me to learn patience as well, but is it worth the price? After months of thinking, I could really only think of one consistently good thing.
Sometimes, difficult people can make you so ridiculously angry that anything can be funny. The time I saw that chicken cross the road; any other day it would've been just mildly humorous. But that day, I was coming home after a particularly frustrating day with my trainer. I was on the brink of a breakdown, and with my emotions so close to the surface, that chicken was the funniest thing I'd ever seen.
I'll probably never really like my trainer, and we'll certainly never be friends. For now, the best I can do is not hate his guts. Baby steps, after all. My advice when faced with someone difficult is to take it one day at a time and be grateful for the times they put you so on edge, that even the little things will make you laugh.
