Coming from experience, long-distance relationships are quite the adventure, filled with ups and downs and everything in between. I am currently in round two of a long-distance relationship with my boyfriend of over two years. We started dating the summer before my senior year of high school, so we had a whole year of getting to know each other before we went off to college. We are currently a little over 300 miles away, me at school in Ohio and him close to home in Illinois. There are definitely positive things about LDRs as well as negative things that I know anyone in a long distance relationship can relate to. Here are the good, the bad, and the ugly of LDRs:
The Good
The First Hello
Coming home during the school year is always great because it's a break from school and the chance to catch up with your family. But something I also enjoy about coming home is seeing my boyfriend for the first time since we last saw each other weeks (or even months) ago. The pure joy I feel as I run into his arms is the best feeling in the world. As he picks me up and spins me around and my legs dangle in the air, I can't hide the huge grin on my face and how happy I am to be in the same state, let alone the same room, with him again. There's no feeling like it.
Skype Calls
My boyfriend and I Skype every Sunday when we are at school, and we have since we started college. This year, we have also started Skyping while we do our homework "together." Even though he is far away, being able to see his face and hear his voice after a long week or a long day is always comforting. The use of technology is crucial in a LDR, and Skype is one of the many things people can use to stay connected over long distances.
Distance Makes the Heart Grow Stronger
This may be totally cliché, but it is also 100 percent true. Our relationship would not be in the place it is now if we could see each other every day. Our communications skills are better, we find new ways to show each other how much we appreciate each other, we find new ways to be there for each other, and so much more. Going from being 15 minutes away to being five hours away can be tough, but in the end it is also worth it because it makes the relationship that much stronger.
The Bad
No Hugs
One of the things I always miss at school are my boyfriend's hugs. After a long day of class and work and mounds of homework that keeps me up past midnight, his hugs are all I want sometimes. The feeling of being in his arms makes all my cares seem to melt away. But at school, I don't get to have that feeling. Going weeks without any physical affection can be very difficult but makes those first hellos I mentioned earlier that much more worth the wait.
No Dates
Dates are so much fun! They show off the creativity of a couple and allow a couple to bond over fun activities. But being in a LDR prevents that from happening while at school. Eating dinner in fancy clothes over Skype can suffice in the circumstances, but it doesn't beat a picnic in the park or a bowling match.
The Ugly
The Distance
Distance can get to a person very easily if they are in a LDR. Being in different time zones and going to different schools hundreds of miles away can put a damper on things. Being far away means that if your SO is having a bad day, you can't just stop by and give them a hug and be there for them. You are forced to get creative in showing them you are always there for them. Being far away and knowing that he is having a hard time or needs comfort is hard because sometimes, it makes me feel helpless. In those moments, the distance is very evident, but having good communication can make it a little easier.
The Goodbyes
This is by far the absolute worst part of a LDR. Goodbyes in a long-distance relationship means that once you leave, you won't be seeing your SO for more than a few weeks, often longer than a month. I have been fortunate that my boyfriend goes to school close to home, so that when I go home, he is already there; but that still means I have to wait until the next time I go home to see him. Goodbyes are often filled with tears and lots of "delaying the inevitable." As it gets closer to the time I have to leave, I can't help but think about how I soon won't be able to feel his arms around me or hear his voice right next to me, and that is extremely hard. But saying "see you soon" also means that the next time we see each other will be the happiest moment, and that is always something to look forward to.
Long-distance relationships aren't for everyone, but if you are willing to work at it, they can be wonderful. It takes patience, good communication, and trust, but it is all worth it when you get to see them again.
