Every single time something bad happens, you'll hear that phrase, "God will never give you more than you can bear," and it gets on my nerves. This phrase is also not biblical. I realize people say it with a good heart. When we're at a loss for words, this seems to be the best thing to help comfort someone. Especially being in the South, you hear this phrase quite often, but sometimes, this phrase begins sounding more like a taunt than something comforting.
This is a very misguided interpretation of scripture. Paul wrote, "No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can endure it." (1 Corinthians 1:13). Paul is talking about idolatry in this scripture, not divorce, mental illness, or death. He also never says that God won't give you more than you can handle. Paul says you can call on God for a way out. This is far different than saying nothing can happen to you.
God will give you more than you can bear on your own, so you will rely on Him. There will be times when God will give you what you think could be the worst thing possible. In doing this, it could bring you closer to Him and help you with your faith. Your faith needs to grow. When you're first introduced to Christ, you learn some of the basics: born sinners, Jesus died for our sin so we could spend eternity with Him, etc. Once you are further along in your walk with God, you will have trials, just as most of those in the Bible were faced with.
We also do not need to be self-reliant. We are called to fully rely on God. You feel like you need to bring yourself up from the things which seem negative in life, but God says several times in his Word that He will help us. He wants us to lean on Him.
