Recently, I have converted to the lifestyle of part time glasses wearer to full time. Throughout this new transition, I have noticed a multitude of funny, cool and out right bizarre occurrences. Here are ten things that happen to you if you wear glasses.
1. People will almost immediately ask you why you don’t wear contacts.
I don’t know maybe because I don’t want to touch my eyeballs?
For me, contacts are just another a daily hassle that I do not want to deal with. I really love the way glasses fall on my face. I find it insulting when asked why I choose to wear my frames because they are not only so I can see, but are a style choice.
2. You’ll get marks on the bridge of your nose.
I spend the end of my day rubbing the bridge of my nose to remove my marks.
3. You’ll get a weird pain on the back of your ears when you take them off.
It feels like one of your facial features is detached and missing when they are in the case.
4. You have automatic assumed intelligence…just for wearing glasses!
It is a generally assumed that intelligent people wear glasses (Bill Gates, anyone?). So go ahead and make that stupid quip, they’ll think you’re a genius anyway!
5. On the downside, people may call you a nerd.
I personally don’t mind being called a nerd. I tend to laugh it off. Nerds to me are creative and weirdly passionate, all of which I identify with! However, this term may insult some glasses wearers. Do not be surprised if someone asks you if you read manga directly after exiting the optometry office.
6. You will feel the need to constantly wipe your glasses.
Unfortunately, it will not always be with that microfiber cloth like you promised the women behind the counter. It will be with your sleeve, with your shirt or with tissue paper taken from the bathroom at Subway.
7. The glasses will fog up when it rains.
You will wish for windshield wipers when this happens because you need to see too, damn it.
8. You will be told, “You look so much better without your glasses on,” if you ever happen to not wear them.
…Which, if you have as much sass as me you will respond with, “You look so much better without my glasses on too!”
9. People will ask you to try your glasses on.
Depending on what type of person you are, you may say a flat “No”. If you’re the same type of person as me, you will let them try your glasses on whitelist silently praying they don’t break your custom fitted frames.
10. People will say to you, “Wow! You are like, sooo blind!”
Hence the glasses!
