My guess is that you clicked on this article because you are a person who:
A) values and supports the women in your life and want to truly learn what women in 2017 are going through.
B) is a strong woman yourself and want to feel understood and maybe even share this article with others in your life to help explain your situation.
or
C) doesn't identify as a feminist and believes that this generation of women are simply grumbling so you're reading this article to complain about how "wrong" I am.
In this article, I am not going to put down people such as Tomi Lahren because that goes against everything I am about to discuss. Instead I simply hope to open up a world in which you as the reader can step into to have some idea of what being a woman in 2017 entails.
So for the next five minutes imagine yourself as a woman. Put on some confidence and red lipstick and we will see if you have both of those by the end of the day. Some content may be hard to read and is sensitive. Reader's discretion is advised.
It's 6:00am and your alarm clock goes off. You may be jumping out of bed to start breakfast and get the kids ready for school because your significant other may view that as your job. Or you may be waking up to put your own work clothes on but are receiving glares from your mother as she comes over to watch your children because she believes it is a mans job to provide for the family.
It's 6:45am and you're pulling into your parking lot at work and you swerve to miss a pothole. But when you enter work, your co-worker is already making a joke about how "women can't drive"
It's 7:00am and you're upset because you just spilled coffee on your new white button down. As you're speed walking to the bathroom to rinse it off your co-worker says "Good morning, can you review this budget with me?" And you reply "Not this minute, I need to get this off before it stains." But your co-worker says "Guess it's that time of the month."
It's 7:30am and you've finally got the stain clear but your white shirt is still soaked. When you sit down at your desk, your co-worker leans over and says with a wink "I like it better that way."
It's 9:00am and you still feel uncomfortable about what your co-worker said to you earlier so you decide to go talk to the HR department. After explaining the matter to the HR representative, they reply by saying "That is just locker room talk. They don't mean any harm."
It's 11:30am and it is finally time for lunch. You're super excited to try the new soup and sandwich shop downtown and have some alone time but your co-worker runs up to you right before you're about to leave and says "Hey, I've been wanting to tell you this for a while but I like you and I think you're pretty hot. Would you want to go on a date say maybe, Thursday?" And you reply "No, thank you. I'm not really interested." Your co-worker yells back "What? Do you think you're too good for me? Whatever. You're not that hot anyway."
It's 3:00pm and you're waiting in line to receive your paycheck before you leave work. Your co-worker says "Wow, I made $1,840 this paycheck." But you glance down at yours and realize you only got paid $1,435 when you know that you both do the same job and work the same hours.
It's 3:30pm when you finally arrive home to change your clothes and head off to the gym. When you arrive at the gym you walk past a group of gym members and hear "I can't believe she is wearing that." It takes everything in you not to go home and never return to the gym.
It's 5:00pm and you've finally finished your workout. As you're leaving the gym you feel someone come up behind you and smack your butt. When you turn around you notice someone walking away and yelling "Nice ass!"
It's 5:30pm and you remember you have to go pick up your birth control at the store. When you arrive and give the pharmacy technician your name and date of birth they reply "That will be $50." You reply "That must be a mistake. With my insurance I only pay $30." The technician replies saying "I'm sorry ma'am but your insurance has changed their policy and your medication is no longer covered." You pay the $50 and leave the store.
It's 7:00pm by the time you get home because you got stuck in traffic. Your stomach is rumbling and you realize you haven't eaten dinner yet so you grab your jacket and head out to grab some Chinese takeout downtown.
It's 7:15pm and you can see the neon lights revealing the restaurant. Just as you're 15 feet away you notice a group of people watching you as you approach the restaurant. You grab tightly onto your purse and put your hands on the pepper spray that you keep inside. Just in case.
It's 7:20pm and you have just paid for your Chinese and are leaving the restaurant to go home and chow down but as you leave you notice one person is still outside. You try to not make eye contact and attempt to walk quickly past them but the grab you from behind. You try to scream but you can't because they have put their hand over your mouth. You try to wiggle free but their grip is too strong. They hit you over the head and you pass out...
It's 11:00pm and you wake up in a hospital. There is a person standing at your bedside informing you that you had just been assaulted and raped and that someone found you in the street and called an ambulance.
It's 12:00am the next day and you are lying in a hospital bed after just completing a rape kit and are eating a snack while watching the news. A person on the news is reporting a story with the headline 'WOMAN WEARING TIGHT CLOTHING IS FOUND IN STREET AFTER BEING RAPED.' You're so so tired and broken, but at least you survived another day.
This is a heartbreaking situation but the truth is that this is reality for women all over the world. Certainly, not all women have experienced these exact circumstances but far too many have dealt with exactly this and much, much more.
I'd like to point out that throughout my entire article, I never once stated that the "antagonist" in these situations was male. I simply used words such as people, co-worker and person.
Unfortunately, I am able to write about these events because they either happened to me or women extremely close to me. If you were person A, thank you for reading my article and I hope to inspire you to be an advocate for women all over. If you were person B, feel free to share this article with whomever you choose. You're such a strong woman and I am fighting for you. If you were person C, I really hope you learned something and don't leave as ignorant as you began.
If you or any one else in your life (woman or not) are experiencing any form of harassment or abuse I encourage you to seek help. The following link will connect you to the joyful heart foundation website.
Here you can find information about how to receive help with sexual assault and rape, domestic violence, child abuse and neglect, vicarious trauma and internet safety. The website includes numerous help hotlines.
"Never be afraid to ask for help when you need it. What are we here for, if not for each other?"
