How do you know when to give a person a second chance at being in your life? This is a question I’ve come to answer a few times in the last few months. And the people in question, are f*ckboys of sorts.
In case you don’t know what a f*ckboy is. I’ve included an informational video from a wonderful lady that will be enjoyable and give you extensive knowledge on the subject:
Anyways, I was faced with the option of letting these characters back in to my life – and my heart – or slamming the door and locking it, hoping they never knock again. I opted to be kind and to see what a second chance entails.
I know that there are definitely times where you shouldn’t even think about talking to this person again. Whether it because they did something outrageously horrible or they were just so flaky the first time, you know that the story isn’t going to be much different the second time. (At that point, I wouldn’t even bother letting them back in.)
But if you do decide to open your heart up to these kind of guys again, just know that there are some boundaries to set in place in order to keep yourself from getting hurt again, because that would almost be worse than the first time you fell for their trickery.
1. Don’t devote your life to them.
The first time you probably fell head over heels for this person, and when they started pulling away you feel like you lost your sense of self. This time, know how to take proper measures to have your own life, and include them in it when you see it fit. The right guy will know that you need time to grow into the swing of things again, and he needs to prove himself in a matter that shows he actually cares about you.
2. Don’t sleep with them.
Even if you guys were on that level before, don't automatically go back. This might be exactly what they’re looking for. Even if they do seem to have changed, give it some time, you don’t need to get frisky right away again.
3. Hang out with your girlfriends.
After you’ve spent some time with this guy again, gather your friends and analyze the situation. Don’t over-analyze everything, but talk about how you think it’s going. It’s good to verbalize with people who have an outside perspective on the whole thing. And good friends will never lie to you, but they will tell you that you’re a Queen who deserves a King.
4. Give yourself time.
Think about taking time to be with yourself. Analyze the situation on your own. If you feel like its going south, take a step back, because gut instinct is pretty reliable.
Overall the truth of the matter is whoever you let back into your life, after they’ve hurt you once, automatically has the stronger ability to do so again. You just have to be smart about it, and know the warning signs of f*ckboy behavior if it starts coming back for Round Two. Just use common knowledge, and don’t get yourself into awful situations, because no matter what you deserve the best.
