The sun is shining, birds are chirping flowers are blooming and temperatures are rising. Spring is in the air, which means a couple of things. You can finally shed your winter coat. More importantly, however, this change of season means spring parties are finally among us. Yes, it is truly the most wonderful time of the year. Now, at these parties you will encounter several types of people from all over campus whom you probably won't remember meeting. If you are lucky enough, however, you will encounter the several types of stereotypical girls who all congregate to a fraternity's lawn for a memorable spring darty.
1. The girl in the flower crown.
What would a spring party be without a girl in a flower crown? Answer: pointless. For some reason these females find a day party to be the appropriate time to wear a flower crown while their reasoning remains unclear to the rest of society. Is this day party themed? No. Are they at Woodstock? No. Does it make you look cool? Absolutely not. For these reasons, and more, modern society is completely confounded about their life choices. These girls are debatably the worst type of person you will meet at this darty. All I know is this girl is probably very shallow, and thinks she looks trendy. Seriously, steer clear of this girl. If she made the decision to wear a flower crown sober, what other decisions will she make intoxicated?
2. The girl being carried out by her friends.
While you may not actually meet this girl, you will surely cross paths with her as you arrive and she is being escorted out of the darty around noon. Since spring parties occur during second semester, mostly everyone should know their alcohol tolerance by this point in the year. But, there is always that lone straggler who thinks chugging a bottle of raspberry vodka on an empty stomach is a great idea at ten in the morning. While you may not get to meet this girl, only listen to her incoherent mumbling as her friends haul her out before she passes out on the lawn, just be happy that this is not you. “Girl being carried out" is surely going to wake up around 7 p.m. with a massive hangover, realizing she just needs to figure it out.
3. The girl you meet in line for the bathroom.
This is by far the best girl you will meet all day. In fact, for a mere ten minutes, you will have convinced yourself you have found your long lost soulmate as you patiently wait your turn to pee. This girl seems to understand you on a spiritual level. You both realize you have a few mutual friends—So how have you never had the blessing of meeting each other before?! You and this girl will swap stories of love, loss and everything in between during these ten minutes of waiting. You'll probably take a picture, share numbers and then, sadly, it is your turn to pee and you lose each other forever. When you go through your pictures the next day, you will wonder who this mystery girl is, and why you have her number...
4. The girl roaming around alone.
As the great Damien from "Mean Girls" once said, “She doesn't even go here!" This girl is wandering around the darty with no end goal. You do not see her exchange a conversation with anyone, so you begin to imagine a life for her -- She is here visiting her cousin Kayla, she goes to University of Alabama, and that really sucks for her. She has conservative parents, and a great Aunt named Bertha whose home she always goes to for Thanksgiving dinner. Then you think, why the hell am I imagining a life for this random girl I have never seen before? And only then do you realize how drunk you are.
5. The girl who is drunk crying.
This girl is infamous and always makes an appearance at every big social event. Whether it be because her best friend snapped at her, her boyfriend glanced at another girl for more than three seconds or she can't find her phone that is actually in her hand, this girl seems to be having the most traumatic moment of her young life unfold at this darty. You kind of want to give this girl a hug and tell her to stop crying because she is an ugly crier and is freaking everyone out, but you also want to watch what unfolds. You get to thrive off the fact that you are, for once, not this girl, but unfortunately you relate to her. The girl who is drunk crying is sure to make every spring party feel complete.
