At age 7, her dad told her that her needed to lose weight.
At age 10, her "best friend" called her a whore.
At age 14, her boyfriend said he didn't like her anymore because she didn't make out with him.
At age 17, her teacher told her that she would never get into college.
At age 19, she began to realize how wrong everyone was about her.
Growing up, this girl learned she would never be good enough for everyone else. She questioned everything. Would anyone love her? Could she ever make anyone happy? This seemingly happy girl was destroyed by society and it's norms. She couldn't be fat, but also not too skinny, smart but not a know it all, and flirty but not skanky. There was a mold that she had to fit into that would just never happen. People tried to shape and change her. Life was filled with things that caused her to break.
She had to learn to be strong. The world around her was against her and she felt more alone than ever. People tried to tear her down and break her spirit. She assumed that she would never be good enough. That girl was me.
My whole life I was told that I wouldn't amount to much and that I had let people down. There was so much negativity in my life. I was beat down emotionally and mentally by the ones I thought loved me. One day I decided that I didn't need that anymore. I saw that I had two choices. I could either let the negativity and doubt get to me or I could pick myself up, brush off the people who hurt me, and learn to live the life I was supposed to. I chose the second.
I chose to live a life where I was happy. I chose to no longer try to conform to what other people wanted. I chose joy. I chose to be me. Once that happened so much else fell into place. Learning to love myself and put my happiness as a high priority was tough at the time but also one of the greatest things I've ever done. In a world that is so cruel and can be so harsh sometimes you need to find your own love and peace.
Take comfort in knowing who you are, loving yourself, and the fact that tomorrow can always be better. From being the girl who was told she would never be much of anything, to now going to an amazing college, having the best group of friends who love me, and feeling like I have a purpose. The choice to choose me was tough but I know it's worth it. I no longer feel like the girl who thought she wasn't good enough. Now I know I'm good enough for myself. That's what matters.
