Guys.

Brothers in Christ.

Friends.

Just ask her.

Wheaton’s annual President’s Ball is just around the corner. On the surface, it looks to be a night of fun with your friends dancing and walking around the Fields Museum of Natural History in your best suit. And that’s because it is. But on a much deeper level it is an opportunity to get an almost guaranteed date with the girl of your dreams or at least one of very rewarding servanthood. Girls are really not that hard to understand, I promise. It’s not that we are desperate to get asked out or something, just that we like to feel special. It is a feeling of being chosen, of being wanted, that we sometimes can’t help but crave. So just ask. Even if you just go as friends, you will get a great night with a beautiful friend and she will get to feel special and loved.

Not convinced yet? Maybe you are at a loss at just how to pull it off. Maybe you don’t feel creative enough or just too lazy to actually go through with an elaborate plan. But flowers are cliché for a reason, and chocolate is a girl’s actual best friend (unless she’s allergic, check on that first). If that’s too expensive for your college student budget, we get that. Put a card in CPO. Make a poster. We are much more easily pleased than you might think. Sure, creativity is always appreciated, but it is truly the thought that counts. I got asked with a bag of peanuts – another story for another time – but it was still really cute because of the thought that went into picking something that simple and meaningful in how I knew the guy.

Keep in mind, girls don’t expect perfection. I won’t lie to you by saying we don’t imagine the ideal scavenger hunt, music video, trail of roses, but at the end of the day all we need is to know someone thought enough of us to ask. I have a friend who used to encourage me to always muster 20 seconds of courage (pretty sure it was Matt Damon inspired, but still). The worst that could happen is she says no, and you haven’t lost anything. In fact, even a rejection of your offer gains you experience for next time and probably gratitude from whoever you asked. It is so flattering for a girl to be approached by a guy who is putting himself out there, who is willing to spend the money and time treating you how you’ve always been told you deserved.

So just ask. And invest in a nice suit if you don’t have one. As a friend of mine said just an hour before I wrote this article, guys go up two hotness points just by wearing a nice suit. But don’t wear your dad’s. We can tell.

Good luck! All females (and probably males too for that matter) are rooting for you. So what are you waiting for? Start planning and ask her already! You know who I'm talking about...