Getting Over The Friendship Breakup You Didn't Want To Happen

Getting Over The Friendship Breakup You Didn't Want To Happen

How to move on from the friendship you didn't want to end.
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As life progresses, we're bound to have many people come and go as they please. What really hurts is when we weren't prepared for the relationship to end. I'm sure you've had a situation like this happen, that's probably why you're reading this. As for me, my best friend hurt me in one of the worst ways possible, so I was forced to end the friendship. I still wasn't prepared for that ending. She was one of the most important and influential people in my life, and I still miss her. My grief about the ending of a four-year long friendship doesn’t excuse what she did.

But I’ve forgiven her.

I’ve forgiven her because even though she hurt me, I know she’s still a good person. I’ve forgiven her because even though she hurt me, she was someone who I shared everything with. I’ve forgiven her because she was someone who I considered my sister.

You can’t hold on to hate for someone who impacts your life like that, even if they did hurt you. She was someone I just naturally connected with. We were like the same person, and trying to find someone who can replace that is no easy feat.

Sometimes breaking up with a best friend can be more painful than breaking up with your significant other. Once we go through a breakup, we resonate with the fact that our real soulmate is still out there waiting for us. But how can we replace our best friend once they break up with us? That person was there for everything and they know everything about you. Even thinking about replacing that person sounds awful.

Having to somehow find a new best friend that can bring to the table everything your original best friend once did seems like a tiring and impossible task. How are we supposed to find a new best friend, when we didn’t even want to lose the first one?

Friendships shape who we are. When we surround ourselves with people, we can start to pick up their mannerisms and little sayings. So when a friendship ends, it’s like losing a piece of who you were. Having to pick up and move on from that is difficult.

It’s okay to be sad about a friendship breakup. Losing a best friend is just like a break up in a romantic relationship. It really really sucks. It feels lonely and sometimes you feel embarrassed because you feel the way you do. It’s almost as if since you weren’t dating this person, then you aren’t allowed to feel this way. But that couldn’t be further from the truth. Moving on is going to take time, just like any romantic relationship. There’s nothing wrong with feeling like you’re empty, like a piece of you is missing.

Although I and my ex-best friend aren’t in each other’s lives anymore, I’ll be the bigger person and admit that I miss her. Although I have an amazing girlfriend and emotional support dog, I still miss the comfort of my best friend. But it’s a sad reality that friendship can’t last forever. If you’re struggling to get over a friendship break up, it’s okay to feel the way that you do. You’re allowed to grieve even if you guys were just friends. But just like any other romantic relationship breakup, you and I both will get through it.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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18 Things That Happen When You Get A Good Roommate

Not every roommate story is a bad one.
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Whenever you hear about roommate stories, they're almost never good, and they usually scare you into never wanting a roommate. "Did you hear her roommate steals her clothes?" "Her roommate doesn't shower!" "Wow, her roommate doesn't talk at all, and doesn't do laundry." From what I hear, there are more bad stories than good. That is why I consider myself lucky, because my roommate is nothing like one of those bad stories. When life hands you a good roommate after talking to about 40 girls through Facebook, a few things happen.

1. You always have someone to talk to.

2. You know each other's schedules, and whenever you both have a break is an exciting time.

3. You'll never have to dance alone.


4. You always have someone to do something with, even if it's just walking down the hall.

5. You both look out for each other, because this is your first time without your parents.

6. You always have a shoulder to lean on when things get tough.

7. Borrowing each other's things is a daily thing.

8. You TRY to help with each other's homework and assignments.

9. They're encouraging when it comes to boys. (Unless they're a f*ckboy.)

10. They're your biggest support system and your personal cheerleader.

11. They never forget to wish you luck on a big exam.

12. They accept how gross you are in the morning and not so pleasant sometimes.

13. You both know each other's favorite and least favorite things.

14. Leaving each other notes saying goodbye before class if you don't see them is normal.

15. Saying goodbye for breaks is upsetting.

16. Not seeing them all day is upsetting.

17. You have more pictures together than any of your other friends.

18. You found a best friend for life.

Cover Image Credit: Jordan Griffin

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the high school me vs the college me

Why everyone said that partying in college changed me.

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I think its only fair that my first post starts off with something I constantly dealt with my first year in college, and believe it or not, many of you might find yourself in the same situation.

See, in high school I was known as the "good girl". My parents sheltered me, and I was always involved in activities that kept me busy and out of trouble. Not to mention I also had a boyfriend who pretty much held me down all of high school (in a good way of course). I am a first generation college student, and had no idea what to except coming into my first year. I did know however that I wanted to have fun and really get the full college experience. With that I decided to rush so I could have a sense of belonging. Sooner than I knew it was the first day of classes, and my new friends had invited me to a party on a Monday night and all of sylly week. I didn't hesitate to say no, I was excited to go out and I had actually been broken up with the same day, so I thought partying would be better than staying home all night crying and fighting over the phone. So I partied that night, just about every night that week, and all throughout the semester, and that's when all the backlash arrived.

These parties were like something I had never seen, the type of parties you see in movies. I obviously posted them on my Snapchat stories and pictures on my Instagram. While I was out living my best life there was people constantly downgrading me just because they didn't agree with what I was doing. People from high school were spreading rumors about me, even the teachers! I would constantly get sent tweets about me, old friends would tell I changed for the worst and they hated the "new" me. However, for the people who actually knew me they supported me 100% and knew I was just as serious about my academics. Everyone just had their image of who I was in high school still in their mind, but many different factors made me blossom into who I am now. For the most part I played the role of "being the bigger person". I deleted people off my snapchat that I knew would stir the pot, I unfollowed many others as well. No matter what I did, those specific few would have only chose to see the bad side of me. I decided the best thing to do was let go of that negativity and work hard to prove them all wrong.

So, I leave you all with this. Maybe the party scene isn't your cup of tea, or maybe you cannot wait to go to your first college party. Whatever the situation might be, just do whats best for you, and what makes you happy. As long as you know exactly what you're doing, don't worry about others say. College is a place to find yourself, and that's going to include lots of lessons along the way. The people who talk down on you are honestly clueless on the whole story, and chances are most of them might be in your exact same position soon. Live your life for yourself, and remember even though college is fun. You do need to find the balance between work and play. No one will be around to tell you what to do, which is both a blessing and a curse.

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