Your Heart May Be Broken From Lost Love, But The Memories Will Soon Make You Smile

Your Heart May Be Broken From Lost Love, But The Memories Will Soon Make You Smile

You won't always be sad when you listen to that song on your playlist.


Life is strange (as if the video game title didn't summarize life enough). Everybody goes through this thing we like to call "heartbreak." Now, while I would love to discuss other topics that are prevalent in my life such as mental health, my new job, and my journey to self-love and self-acceptance, I don't think I can talk about those without getting this out of the way first.

Heartbreak is weird.

Heartbreak is weird because the moment you break it off, everything changes so fast. The person who was a huge part of your life for a period of time quickly becomes the person you pass on the street and don't say a word to, almost as if those months never happened. They quickly become the person who you keep at a distance when they were once the one closest to you. Every time you're in the same room as them, you're content, yet you hurt. You hurt for all the memories that flash behind your eyes, turning from color to black and white as the memories dissolve as fast as they did, out of reach. Unable to relive. Unable to bring back.

As you delete every text message and wipe away every tear, you feel like you're losing a part of yourself. The sharp inhale as you scroll through your camera roll a little too quickly, never allowing your eyes to linger in fear that everything will be brought back. You hit shuffle on the all too familiar playlist, the one playing in the car during every drive that summer, each song tied to a memory, tied to that person. It all comes racing back with every note, with every word. The way your heart clenches unbearably in your chest as your fingers sweep over the letters glued in your journal, the ones you can't bring yourself to reread yet again. All of the history haunting you, seeing the ghost of this person in your bedroom, in your house. Seeing the ghost of your former self, smiling like an idiot in your very bed with every text from them and with every night you spent on the phone for hours at a time.

The thing that hurts the most about memories isn't the fact you'll never get to go back. No.

The thing that hurts the most is remembering how happy you were at that very moment, a moment you can't return to.

The thing that hurts the most is being smacked back into reality and being forced to return to your new life, the one where they're hardly in. You go from hanging out any chance you got and talking every night to glances from across the room. You go from telling someone how much you want to be with them to walking away, having to readjust your life to no longer need them. And just like that, without any warning, everything you once had slips away right before your eyes.

After this person walks out of your life, you will never be the same again. In my case, that was a good thing for me. Even though I was having thoughts about breaking up with this person before the actual breakup, it didn't make the mourning period any easier.

I was in love.

I felt loads of emotions that some people only dream of. I gave someone a huge part of myself only to have that taken away from me, even if it was for the best. You see, the thing about heartbreak is even though it feels like your entire world has shattered around you, you have to remember that it happened for a reason. You have to reflect on your past relationship and learn from it. You have to grow from it. You have to resist the temptation to go back to that person, even when it feels familiar and even when it feels safe. That was my biggest problem: resisting the urge. This person was my best friend and when we broke up, it felt like I not only lost my partner, but my best friend, too. I didn't know what I was going to do or how I was ever going to get over it.

But, let me assure you of one thing: You will move on, and you will be better for it.

However, just because you have moved on, it doesn't mean you will never hurt again because you will. You will go on with your life, making more memories and meeting new people, but that part of your life will always exist. That person doesn't just disappear because you have moved on. Your heart might even still ache from time to time. But, as time goes on like it always does, you will find that the aching and tears happen less and less until it no longer occurs. It will happen until you start smiling instead of crying because even though that part of your life is no longer a reality, you will start smiling because it happened.

You will always love that person because they were once the most important person in your life and eventually, you will be thankful for the memories you shared and everything they taught you because even though heartbreak is the worse, it's just one heartbreak away from finding the person who you will spend forever with. Once that happens, you will finally understand why it never worked out, to begin with.

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To My Boyfriend's Mom

He loves you more than you could ever imagine...

Without you, there would not be a him, so first things first, thank you.

1. Thank you for teaching him to love a woman the right way, to put God first, and YOU before me always, the respect he shows you is so attractive, and you deserve it.

He talks about you like you hung the moon, I don't doubt for a second that he will be an amazing father one day, I owe all of that to you.

2. Thank you for giving me a chance, learning to love me when you knew your son was doing the same.

I can't speak for my own first impressions, but hopefully mine was not THAT bad...when we both slapped him on the arms for his rude remark at the same time, I knew our relationship was already blossoming.

SEE ALSO: Finding A Husband In College

3. Thank you for every meal you have ever purchased me.

And chocolate, and know just as well as your son does that food is the way to my heart. Especially Taco Bell and cheesecake ;)

4. Thank you for your advice, suggestions, and opinions...and asking for mine

Whether it's telling me to slap him for being a smart a$$, or you're asking me about color swabs for your kitchen makeover, you come to me as if I am your own, and I am so honored to give you my own input.

5. Thank you for including me

You never fail to leave a spot for me, and I love family dinners/outings with you guys just as much as I love my own!

6. Thank you for teaching your son to never give up, and that if he does it is only to better himself, or it's the only choice he has left.

He is so focused on his future, he wants the best for himself, and he is constantly reminding me that these are things that YOU taught him, you deserve to be so proud.

7. Thank you for letting him love my family, and allowing me to love yours.

He is so loyal and loving to my family, and I don't even have to ask myself why because I see him with you and yours. Thank you for letting us double up on holidays when we can, and making sure we get the most out of our time with you!

8. Thank you for being his best friend.

I think of him as mine too, but I couldn't think of a better person to also hold that title, you know him better than anyone else and you always will.

9. Thank you for teaching him how to treat a woman

He is constantly telling me "You sound like my mother." Thankfully earlier in our relationship, he told me that the woman he wants to be with, should do just that. He always tells people who try, "No, no one calls me by my full name except my mom and my girlfriend."

10. Thank you for your honesty

We all know that he and I can drive you crazy sometimes, thank you for telling us like it is, and making sure we know you still love us anyways.

SEE ALSO: 8 Tiny Lies Every Young Woman Has Told Their Best Friend

11. Thank you for teaching him to work as hard as possible in anything and everything he does.

I have never met anyone with such a desire for success, he and I are constantly discussing how we can better our futures, and I know exactly where his drive comes from.

12. Thank you for teaching him to clean up after himself

Even though sometimes, it takes him a minute to do so.

13. Thank you for teaching him how to love, and letting him love me.

I have never felt so loved by a man, probably because anyone else who came into my life was just a boy. Thank you for your unconditional love for him, he is your entire heart and that is so easy to see, I am happy to share his with you.

You and I both know that even years from now we will both occasionally probably be closing the fridge that he left open, cleaning the crumbs he dropped, demanding he take a shower after playing soccer, or reminding him 20 times about plans we made weeks ago, we both share such a great love for such an amazing man. I could never be more thankful that you brought forth into this world such a comforting, supportive, protective, steadfast, driven, handsome, and hilarious guy. Thank you for everything you do for him, for me, and for us, I love you a lot!

Cover Image Credit: casey

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The Truth About Dating A Girl With An Anxiety Disorder

She knows how annoying she can be, but she just prays you love her regardless of her flaws.


Anxiety: A nervous disorder characterized by a state of excessive uneasiness and apprehension, typically with compulsive behavior or panic attacks.

The definition makes it sound really daunting. Truthfully, there is no one way to describe generalized anxiety disorder if you have it. It is hard to live with, hard to cope with and unfortunately, really hard to date with.

Girls with anxiety are different than the average girl when it comes to relationships. That's just an honest statement, no matter how much it hurts me to say it.

We need the constant reminder that you love us, even though we know in our hearts that you do. We panic when you don't answer your phone, in fear that we did something wrong. We care about your feelings when you say that we don't need to worry and we need to be a little calmer. But it's so damn hard.

It isn't easy to love someone who worries about everything 24/7. Half the time, we know we shouldn't be doing the things we do. We know we shouldn't blow up your phone or ask just one more time if you are mad at us. But we can't help it. It says it right in the definition: compulsive behavior due to excessive uneasiness.

Being with a girl with anxiety is probably downright exhausting. It's exhausting for us to have our minds constantly running and worrying. But I promise it's worth it.

We come to you with everything because you are the one person who always knows how to make us feel better. When we are happy, you are the one person we want to be happy with. We all know the constant reassurance, reminders and the same old arguments get old. It gets old to us too.

There was never a time I wanted to have a panic attack because my boyfriend wasn't answering his phone. In my head, I knew where he was because he was usually in the same three places. I knew he wasn't mad at me because I didn't do anything to make him upset. I knew how busy he was with his classes and he was probably studying and I needed to give him space. But the little voice in my head always argued, "What if you did something wrong? What if he's ignoring you because he's angry? What if he's seen your messages and calls, but no longer wants to be with you?" And then I give in. I call, I text, I cry, I panic. Only to feel even worse 10, 30 or 50 minutes later because you answer angrily, telling me what I already knew after I did what I knew I shouldn't have done.

Having anxiety is almost like having a drug addiction. You know all the things that trigger you. You know all the ways to stay away from the bad places in your mind so you don't end up relapsing. But you do anyway and it hurts worse every single time.

Dating a girl with anxiety is as hard as it gets, but she will love you like no other. She is so incredibly thankful for all the things you put up with to be with her. Because she is worried about being loved, she goes the extra mile to always remind you how much you are loved. She always asks if you are ok because she cares about the answer and knows what it's like not to be ok.

The truth is that dating anybody with anxiety is difficult, but it isn't impossible. You get back everything you put in, even though you may not realize it. Trust me, she is sorry for being the annoying, crying, worried, naggy mess and it embarrasses her because she knows better and she wants to be better for you. But please love her. Hold her, understand her, listen to her, calm her, be there for her. In your heart, you know she would turn around and do all the same things for you in a heartbeat.

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