I am a 20-year-old male in college who has observed how people interact quite often, and am proposing we make a change to our social scene. Although, I do appreciate the technological strides we have made in the last 20 years, I am thoroughly disappointed in the relationships that we build with each other. Human interaction is the soul of human nature, and it has become lesser and is getting worse in younger generations. Nothing seems to last in my generation, everything from music to political views to relationships, are all revolved around instant satisfaction. Children are born with an iPhone, iPad etc. in their hands and have lost the ability to experience a memorable childhood revolving around human interaction.

I was born just before the so called “i” generation. I got to experience a childhood that I will cherish forever. Kids these days lack the simplicity in which I was raised. They would rather bury their face in their phones, than go outside. I’m not saying that this article applies to everyone, but from what I have witnessed these thoughts I am sharing seem to be the common trend. Nor am I saying that I have separated myself from this common theme of instant satisfaction. I have social media accounts, and all too often catch myself looking at my phone when I could be doing something much more productive. Some may argue, that our generation is more connected than ever, but this argument is solely based on their specific definition of connected. Yes, we may think we know someone by seeing what they have to say or post on Facebook, twitter, Instagram etc. but we instantly jump to conclusions about these people.

It is human nature to judge others, but our generation seems to do it much more often, and even through the cyber world. It seems nearly impossible for a 13-22 year-old girl to not have an Instagram. These accounts are often associated with a social status. The amount of likes you get on an app can now determine if you are “cool” or not. Although, I have no idea how hard it is to go through these things as a girl, I have witnessed how much stress Instagram can induce. We waste our time worrying about how many different people clicked a picture on their phone, than worrying about our close friends and having face to face interaction. Less people take time out of their day to ask how others are doing, but simply look at their phone to determine how or what someone is doing. This way of interacting has limited our friendships to simply an outer shell. I have often found that even with my closest friends we would rather sit around and look at our phones in silence, than have conversation about what is going on in our lives. It befuddles me where else you would rather be, than with your best friends.

We are too connected in the fact that the outer shell of what someone else is doing seems better. We see what others are doing through apps such as Snapchat, and check it constantly. All too often I see or hear about what someone else is doing in some other place. We jump to the conclusion that these people who we know on an outer level are having more fun than us. I sit back and question how people jump to these conclusions after watching 10 seconds of a Snapchat story. Our generation has the ability to create a perception of ourselves that is socially acceptable, and better than others simply by posting snip bits of ourselves. I often find that conversations with my closest friends revolve around what others are doing, because they have the perception that they are having more fun than us. Our generation fails to live in the moment, and focus on what is front of us. We constantly worry about the perception of ourselves to others. We no longer make memories by living in the moment, but forcefully create them in order to post on some sort of social media. I have seen people do things all too often purely to post on some sort of social media. We have shifted over to focusing on the perception of ourselves, instead of focusing on how those who are around us perceive us which often leads people to take friendships for granted.

My best memories with my friends are the ones that have been spontaneous and technology free. Our first priority should be to assure the happiness of our families, and closest friends, but the constant stimulation of what others are doing has taken away from this simple interaction. I hardly ever get asked how things are going in my life, and get half ass answers when I ask others. The impatience our generation has developed is truly disheartening. True relationships require work. Our generation seems to lack this drive. We choose to interpret things at their face value rather than digging deep, and figuring out how and why other people operate the way they do. We were given emotions for a reason and often we remain too passive to share them on the account that we may offend someone or be judged for stepping out of place.

Personally, I like when people go out of their way to share their thoughts about me, and take them into account whether good or bad. People often keep opinions about others to themselves or share them to others behind their back. All this said, I know exactly how hard this is to do and how hard it is to display your emotions as they may change daily. We need to make a better effort to be patient and listen. Writing someone off right away before truly getting to know a person is not the way in which we should operate. Having deeper level conversation, showing and sharing your emotions face to face are huge steeping stones we must take in order to achieve deeper bonds. Everyone is capable of letting their guard down, and we should never for a second be ashamed of the way we feel about someone. There is no shame in being vulnerable and honest, I think many people in our generation forget this because they are so caught up in the perception of themselves in the eyes of others, instead of truly focusing on being themselves. Since most of us choose not to have these raw face to face encounters we choose to show our emotions towards each other over text which is insufficient of what a true relationship should be. Since when can you determine how a relationship is going through a text? I often see others letting this virtual form of interaction take over how they perceive others. I have seen this go to an extent where if someone may not answer a text for a couple hours, or a day that this leads the perception of this person not caring about a future relationship. We are so quick to write others off purely based off a virtual reality, when in reality things are going great.

Humans have more understanding than you may think, and I think we often forget this. Our generation needs to get out of our comfort zones as this will benefit us in the future. It is now considered weird to ask someone on a date face to face. We often forget that people didn’t always have this ability to communicate in a virtual world but had to have these face to face interactions that may not seem comfortable to us. Although I know our generation still has the ability to interact and are capable of acquiring these true relationships, I think they have become scarce. I believe that the quality of friends is a lot more important than quantity.

If you got anything out of this article, I would like it to be just that. Don’t waste time concerning yourself with what others are doing on social media when you are surrounded by those who truly care about you. Have the conversations that aren’t easy as these will bring you closer together, be vulnerable and honest, share your ideas no matter how crazy they may be, get lost in conversation, and finally turn off your phone every once in a while.