Humans. We judge. We hate. We bring others down when they differ from the norm. We belittle others' situations when we cannot relate. We overlook the small things when they mean the most. We trample on the feelings of others while not realizing the repercussions. I guess it's good that there are writers in the world that can bring these issues to life.
Meet Kyle. One of the best people I have ever met in my entire life. A guy who is clearly going places and has drive and passion, that of which I envy. Someone who, on the outside, seems to have it all figured out. However, surface emotions can be very deceiving...
My friend battled the past couple of years with internal conflicts, sexual insecurities and social pressures. Having been in a fraternity, shared beliefs are vital and "brotherhood" hasn't always been kind to differences and change.
We can cut the bullshit and be honest about Greek life. Many of us have said a racial or prejudice slur. To not admit it...you are simply lying. With the pressures of fraternity and sorority groups, we all tend to go along with the crowd or to agree with the majority. It's extremely important to bond with your brothers or sisters, yet identify and stay true to yourself. If they do not accept you as who you are and what you believe, are they truly your best friends?
Having been ratted out to his fraternity about his sexuality before he was ready to come out, Kyle struggled for over a year to find true acceptance from his brothers. While many were supportive, others may have felt different.
To those out there battling with the same issue, that's okay. Not everyone will be accepting but it's up to you to be strong and confident in yourself. If others judge you, they clearly have too much free time on their hands and lack trust in their own self image.
Some members will celebrate your decision while others may tolerate it. But few will reject your decision. Don't let the few intimidate you. As long as there is mutual respect, everyone has a right to their own beliefs.
"Greek life’s harshest critics understand fraternities to be girl- and beer -obsessed capitols of hazing and alcoholism, where dignity and innocence go to perish (Gallimore, 2014)."
If you are a fellow Greek member, does this quote offend you? Because it should. If you are better than what the harshest critic says, then stand up for those who feel as though they can't defend themselves. If someone you know is coming out in the Greek community, let them know you are their support team. We should love, not hate.
As of now, my best friend is still close with his brothers and continues to grow with them while learning from each other. He deserves a harassment-free life just as each one of us desire.
Humans. We love. We understand. We embrace. We empathize and listen to each other. We notice the little things and adapt to others' needs. We grow together and learn from one another.
Let's change for the better.
If you are someone who needs guidance or advice on coming out, contact me and I will have you connected with Kyle.
