Let me put it this way: College showers aren’t known for their luxuriousness. They also aren’t always warm, which is a problem when you’re already naked as the day you were born and waiting impatiently. Although I’m only a freshman, I already have experience living in two different residence halls (I lived in an all-girls dorm first semester and a co-ed dorm second semester). Because of this, I got well acquainted with the two different types of college showers: the large and the small—so similar, and yet so different. Just so you don’t have to, I created two different strategies for how to combat the wait for warm water. (See the alliteration? That means it’s a real thing.) Because there’s a lot of wasted time.
The first building I lived in had a smaller bathroom (three toilets, two showers), because only about 20 people lived on the floor. The shower stalls were basically narrow rectangles, and since I am the epitome of an inflexible person, we didn’t get along. The reason this was such a problem is because I never wanted to touch the shower walls: To put it lightly, they could be very…icky. So it was a challenge. Because I couldn’t wait in the stall for the water to warm up, I stood in my birthday suit except for my shower shoes (PSA: an absolute must) just outside the door, with one arm in to feel the temperature.
Game #1: Ed Sheeran
Background: There’s an Ed Sheeran song called "You Need Me, I Don't Need You" that I used to listen to a lot. In the song, every sound you hear—vocals, of course, but also guitar, the beatboxing, et cetera—is all Ed.
How To Play: First, pick a song and start singing it (preferably quietly, so nobody rudely interrupts you). With one foot, tap out a simple beat, or a complimentary rhythm to the melody. With the hand not testing the water, snap your fingers in a different rhythm to add another layer of sound. If the temperature is still too cold and you’re getting desperate, add a final layer with the hand in the shower by splashing water against the wall, or changing the way it falls to the drain.
All the melodies and harmonies and beats that I’ve got going on generally take me a while to figure out, meaning that by the time I’m done, the water is warm enough. If not, you should probably talk to your RA, because that shower’s never getting warm.
My other building had a bigger bathroom because about 30 people lived on the floor, so it had five toilets and three showers. The shower stalls were bigger, which was a godsend for inflexible me, because I could shave my legs without worrying about rubbing up against some flaky caulking or moldy slime or other gunk that I’d rather not think about. Here, I would aim the water into a corner and stand in the other side of the stall and wait.
Game #2: Rock In a Pool of Lava
Background: Do you remember playing “The Ground/Floor Is Lava” in elementary school? That was my favorite game. It’s a slumber party must, even now. Like fort-building. Anyway, this game is an adaptation of “The Ground Is Lava."
How To Play: One foot is balanced on a rock, safe from harm. Your other foot, however, has no rock to stand on, as the ground has suddenly been swallowed by lava from a recently-erupted volcano. So it’s your job to balance on one leg for as long as the water is cold. If you think that’s boring, or if you want to raise the stakes, take off one shoe (I feel so passionately about the necessity of shower shoes that I’m putting two PSAs in one article—buy a $3 pair of flip-flops at Walgreens). So if you lose your balance and have to put your foot down, while it won’t have been melted by the billion-degree lava, you’ll wish it had. Like I said, college showers can get…icky.
This game is even more realistic than the elementary school version because you can treat the cold water like the lava you’re trying to avoid. When you start seeing steam, you’re good to go.
In an ideal world, the time we spend waiting for warm water would be spent doing homework or studying for an exam. In a more realistic setting, we’d be getting in an extra Netflix session. Like I said before, there’s a lot of wasted time here. I hope my suggestions make it feel more valuable. It’s okay to do silly things in the shower, because it’s one of the few times of day (unless you live in a single) when you’ll actually be alone.
