Intimacy is a funny word. Well more like the idea of it seems interesting. The definition on Dictionary.com is closeness. I’ve lately thought so much about what it means to be in an intimate relationship lately and what it actually means. For many people intimacy may come to the idea of sex, but it is not sex at all. Yes, we are intimate with our partner with sex, however, intimacy is much more than that. Have we actually forgotten the true meaning of intimacy?
In the process of my adventures, I’ve got to say, sex isn’t at all what I look for in a relationship. Intimacy is when you and that person can sit in a room and just keep each other company - well at least that is what it is by definition. I mean there are many types of intimacy from my understanding - physical, emotional, experimental, cognitive or intellectual - we all determine the word itself differently. It is almost like the notion of crude language in our language.
Yes, love is an important factor in physical and emotional relationships, however, nowadays it almost feels like it doesn’t have to mean love; it’s like we are in love with sex. I mean at first sex sex is exciting. We explore a body we don’t know of and we enjoy the adventure of exploring, but it then gets to the point where we are just making fun of each other or a bit more into sex than building a relationship the person. However, as talking with a friend at work, intimacy can mean the idea of having a deeper understanding of yourself or the ability to make yourself whole to then bring forth the person you are out.
I agree in so many levels with her statement. For one, in order to be in love you have to first be in love with yourself. You have to understand you in order to give back that love of yourself to others. We are somehow conditioned to understand intimacy as two people in love or bound to each other. Love is more than just emotions. Sometimes, when it comes to terms with God, we must first feel His love beyond everything. That can sometimes show us what love is. This as you can see isn’t as straightforward as it seems. Everyone can describe this idea of intimacy is so many ways.
In fact, I think researchers who say it’s between two people are wrong. We can all refute that. Why do we break up with people? Why are their struggles in a relationship sometimes? It is obviously that missing factor intimacy within ourselves. We need to start loving ourselves even more than we already - well not to narcissistic - but in a healthy way. For me, I spoil myself with a new book or with a Broadway show or sometimes even a trip to Montreal. Intimacy is an emotional connection with oneself, a deeper understanding of what it is love oneself and another.
