From The Girl NOT Ready To Settle Down

From The Girl NOT Ready To Settle Down

There's nothing like being independent.
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views

Hi, I am a college girl, and I am NOT ready to settle down.

(And I'm also not sorry about it.)

I know there are a lot of girls out there around 18 to 22 who have decided that they're ready to find "the one" and commit the rest of their lives to that person. Don't get me wrong, I understand these girls. I was one of these girls. But then I had a wake up call.

If you already found someone you love enough to spend the rest of your life loving, then props to you. But I'm not on board.

Maybe this is because I had a long-term relationship throughout my high school years, or maybe it's just because I actually decided to get out of my small town and see more of what the world has to offer, but I'm just nowhere near ready to settle with one person for the rest of my life.

I can understand the mindset of enjoying the comfort of being with a partner. I know the value of the date nights, the Netflix marathons, always having a reliable dinner partner, the inside jokes, and having someone to ask store clerks a question when you're too shy to do it yourself. I get it. But I don't want to just live a "comfortable" life.

There are so many things I would miss out on if I were in a committed relationship.

While I'm young, my life is all about me, and I don't feel bad for being selfish. I can spend time planning my own future instead of making plans revolving around someone else. I can study abroad for a semester or apply for far-away internships without worrying about the struggle of keeping up a long-distance relationship. I can be more outgoing and meet more people at my university instead of staying in watching Netflix every single weekend. These are not things I am willing to give up for a boy.

Relationships are also a lot of work, and I have way too much on my plate right now to worry about fighting with someone over petty problems. At this age, I'm too busy balancing my own activities to try to add in a boyfriend.

All the happiness that I could find in a relationship, I can also have through doing things I enjoy, working towards my future, and spending time with my friends. So why would I add in a relationship that most likely won't work out and will cause added pain in my life I don't need?

I know relationships in themselves are fun adventures, but they're nothing like being independent. My life gets to be solely about me, figuring out who I am, and discovering what I want out of life.

I'll have plenty of time later in life to find someone whom I can spoil with corny gifts, eat pretzels at the mall, hold hands, take goofy pictures and build a life together. But right now I'm creating my own stories and memories.

I'm sure one day I'll be ready for a relationship again, but for now, I'm perfectly content with staying single.


Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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I'm A Woman And You Can't Convince Me Breastfeeding In Public Is OK In 2019

Sorry, not sorry.

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Lately, I have seen so many people going off on social media about how people shouldn't be upset with mothers breastfeeding in public. You know what? I disagree.

There's a huge difference between being modest while breastfeeding and just being straight up careless, trashy and disrespectful to those around you. Why don't you try popping out a boob without a baby attached to it and see how long it takes for you to get arrested for public indecency? Strange how that works, right?

So many people talking about it bring up the point of how we shouldn't "sexualize" breastfeeding and seeing a woman's breasts while doing so. Actually, all of these people are missing the point. It's not sexual, it's just purely immodest and disrespectful.

If you see a girl in a shirt cut too low, you call her a slut. If you see a celebrity post a nude photo, you call them immodest and a terrible role model. What makes you think that pulling out a breast in the middle of public is different, regardless of what you're doing with it?

If I'm eating in a restaurant, I would be disgusted if the person at the table next to me had their bare feet out while they were eating. It's just not appropriate. Neither is pulling out your breast for the entire general public to see.

Nobody asked you to put a blanket over your kid's head to feed them. Nobody asked you to go feed them in a dirty bathroom. But you don't need to basically be topless to feed your kid. Growing up, I watched my mom feed my younger siblings in public. She never shied away from it, but the way she did it was always tasteful and never drew attention. She would cover herself up while doing it. She would make sure that nothing inappropriate could be seen. She was lowkey about it.

Mindblowing, right? Wait, you can actually breastfeed in public and not have to show everyone what you're doing? What a revolutionary idea!

There is nothing wrong with feeding your baby. It's something you need to do, it's a part of life. But there is definitely something wrong with thinking it's fine to expose yourself to the entire world while doing it. Nobody wants to see it. Nobody cares if you're feeding your kid. Nobody cares if you're trying to make some sort of weird "feminist" statement by showing them your boobs.

Cover up. Be modest. Be mindful. Be respectful. Don't want to see my boobs? Good, I don't want to see yours either. Hard to believe, I know.

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Look, I Don't Want Your Boy, But 'break up with your girlfriend, i'm bored' Makes Me Feel Incredible

It makes me feel empowered. It makes me feel my best.

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I have seen so many thoughts and complaints that Ariana Grande's new song, "break up with your girlfriend, i'm bored" is shallow.

Some are even saying, "this song just perpetuates everything that is wrong with dating and relationships in society today."

But, girl, I have to disagree.

You see, just because I sing this song at the top of my lungs in both my dorm's shower and alone in my car, I am not going to steal anyone's boyfriend.

I am simply pretending like I am some kind of bad chick that no one should mess with but in reality, I apologize for walking in someone's direction.

And, let's say, if I were to say something lighthearted or friendly to him and he responds with actions that propose cheating, he wasn't a good boyfriend in the first place.

Listen, girls: stop being so insecure.

You have a boyfriend. He loves you. He chose you. If another girl comes by and his eyes dart her way, his heart wasn't in it all the way.

Not everything is deeper than the skin.

Now, let me be clear, I am not saying that it's OK for girls to go around and try to steal boyfriends. Actually, that's a pretty trashy move that no one should attempt. I know it happens, though. I know it is everyone's worst fear.

However, there is no life living within fear of rejection and being left. If those are the things that linger in the back of your mind, you will never taste the freedom of living.

Truly living.

So am I a bad person, considering that 'break up with your girlfriend, i'm bored' is my anthem?

It makes me feel empowered. It makes me feel my best.

So no, just listening to Ari's new bop doesn't make me a bad person or a boyfriend stealer.

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