When Friendships Leave A Little (Or A Lot) To Be Desired

When Friendships Leave A Little (Or A Lot) To Be Desired

It’s very frustrating to constantly wonder whether someone is really there for you through thick and thin.
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We all have those things about our friends—even our very best friends—that just bug us.

But it’s very confusing when you occasionally feel like the absence of a certain friendship wouldn’t really affect your life as much as you’d like to believe. When you haven’t seen each other in months, hanging out always sounds like a good idea. But after a few hours together you find yourself questioning, again, whether continuing this friendship would really make you happy.

The problem is, there’s a thin, thin line between little annoyances and legitimately bothersome parts in a friendship. Watch out for these warning signs:

1. You feel like you can’t say what you’re really thinking.

Or maybe you can, but it feels strange. Sort of like taking a chance, going out on a limb, testing the waters. It can feel like there isn’t room for your opinions, even on small things. You may wonder, does this person even really know me at all, or do they just think they do?

2. It doesn’t feel fulfilling when you hang out.

"Fulfillment" may sound like a lot to expect from just spending time casually with a friend, but it’s actually really important. Truly great friends feel whole and satisfied after having hung out, even if they didn't really do much of anything.

3. You’d feel weird talking to them about deep stuff.

It’s great for friends to have fun together, but it’s an even better feeling knowing you’ve got someone you can go to when you’ve got a lot on your mind. It’s very frustrating to constantly wonder whether someone is really there for you through thick and thin.

4. You feel like a dimmed version of yourself around them.

True friends bring out the best in each other. In this friendship, though, you feel like they’re bringing out less—way less. People are happiest when they fully embrace every shining trait they possess, and this person makes you feel like not all of them matter.

5. You don’t feel listened to.

Even the closest of friends of course occasionally disagree. But even when there’s a little less understanding on one end, it should still feel as though they care enough to hear what you have to say.

Cover Image Credit: www.readersdigest.ca

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the beautiful barefoot boy

The goal isn't to live forever, but to create something that will.

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This morning, I did the same thing I do every single morning when I wake up. Before my feet hit the floor, I say a prayer. I thank God for waking me up, blessing me with such a good life, and pray for any specific thing that is laying on my heart. Lately, I have been praying a lot for the same person many people in my community have been praying for- Matt McGregor. I have prayed for healing, comfort, strength, and many other things to happen in Matt's journey, but I also prayed that God's will be done in his life above all else. Little did I know yet that His will had been done.

I remember Matt from school. Every time I saw him, everyone around him was laughing. And I am not exaggerating. He was one of those special people who can literally make anyone and everyone laugh no matter the situation. He was one of those people that the world needs around to make life more bearable and just down right better.

Death sucks. Cancer sucks. Yes, I am glad that Matt is no longer suffering, but that does not really give me a sense of relief because I know his family and friends are suffering. I think about Matt's sisters, and cannot fathom the pain that they're feeling. I could not imagine life without my brothers, my kids not getting to grow up and hang out with their cool uncles, and telling on each other to our parents when we all come home for Christmas when we're 40. I think about his parents, who are having to do the hardest thing anyone could have to do, say goodbye to their son. I think about his friends, who's lives will never be the same every time they do something that reminds them that he's no longer here to share life with. He was too young, too full of life. The worst death are the ones that can't be explained, and this one of them.

That's the thing about life, you never know when it's going to end and that is what makes it so fragile. Someone you know passes away, and you suddenly start to contemplate whether you are living your life "good" enough. You wish you'd spent more time with the one who passed, hold on a little tighter to the ones who are still here, and make sure you remind them you love them. But to show someone you love them is much more powerful than telling them, and that is exactly how Matt lived his life. His life light was beaming all the time and he was constantly sharing that with everyone around him. That is part of why he was so special.

When someone dies, they leave their own legacy that is different from every single other person on the planet. Your legacy depends on the amount of light that you have shed on others. Looking through Facebook today, it is so obvious that his light touched so many people. Matt's death has reminded me of those that I have and will continue to lose throughout life... there is no better way to say it than death sucks. But even though death sucks, it reminds us to live our life to the fullest, and continue the legacy of those we've lost.

On a side note, I found it interesting that Matt was barefoot all the time, so I googled being barefoot in biblical times. Moses and Joshua was commanded to take off his shoes as he was standing on holy ground, and poor people did not have shoes so they went barefoot. But this is my favorite: priests in Israel went barefoot while ministering. They would take their shoes off before blessing their people. It is evident that Matt blessed so many people's lives in his short time on this Earth. Coincidence that he was known for always being barefoot? I think not.

Let your life light shine brightly like Matt's, and always live life to the fullest.

. . .

In loving memory of Matt McGregor Jr.

Then I heard a voice from heaven say, "Write this: Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord from now on." "Yes," says the Spirit, "they will rest from their labor, for their deeds will follow them." Revelation 14:13

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