Before ever going to Japan I was always told that I would always be looked at as an outsiders to the Japanese. Any video or article that I would watch to prepare myself before I left warned of this being a common experience that a lot of foreigners felt while living in Japan. Due to the fact that, politically, there is a lot of negative attitudes towards foreigners and many Japanese have had little to none interactions with foreigners it has created a lot of xenophobia within the country. That was the mindset I went with. I was prepared to never fit in and always reminded myself that I was an outsider in this country. In a country where 98.5% of the country is ethnically Japanese you kind of stand out as a white girl from California. The moment I started my journey through the train stations of Tokyo I had already gotten a handful of stares, something that I had never experienced before. My first few days in Tokyo I felt so alone and isolated from everyone else. I expected that I would have this feeling my entire time in Japan, but one of my most memorable memories in Japan completely broke down this idea.
It was a friend's birthday in the dormitory I lived in. He had a favorite bar he wanted to go to in nearby neighborhood. It was about a thirty minute walk from our dormitory and we were a group of six, all foreigners, heading to this bar. Once we reached the neighborhood we wandered the small streets searching for the bar. Turning down this one really small street and we saw this large group of Japanese people standing outside of a bar laughing and talking. As we walked by we politely greeted them and we're about to go on are way when one of them called us over. We started to chat and they told us it was their boss's birthday and that they had been celebrating all night. We told them that it was our friends birthday too and their faces lit up. They immediately insisted that we come in and have a drink and piece of cake to celebrate. They introduced us to their boss who was so funny and did magic tricks for us all. People in their 20s to their late 50s were hanging out together. They had never met us before yet they were so friendly and warm. And even though our Japanese was bad and their English was not so good as well we were somehow able to still connect with each other. We talked for hours and at the end of the night we exchanged contact information and took a group photo together. As the six of us walked home all we could talk about was this amazing experience we just had. In Japanese a way of describing this moment is called ichi-go ichi-e (一期一会), roughly translating to "once in a lifetime moment". It really was a special memory I'll never forget.
That night made me realize that people can connect whatever the language being spoken, the way you look, or even age. No matter what people tell you there is always a chance to cross the boundary of "outsider". Whatever is said about a particular culture does not mean it's a set-in-stone rule; humans are willing and want to connect with others. That connection makes it possible to break down stereotypes and gives everyone the chance to represent their country in a way that maybe others have never thought of before. I had just assumed I would always be on the outside, but this experience had completely dispelled those feelings. I may never be Japanese, but that doesn't mean I can't have meaningful connections.
