As time goes by, things tend to change. People tend to change. Inevitably, those changes lead to people drifting away from each other, regardless of how close they were.

I like to consider myself a good friend. My friends have consistently been more important to me than anything in life. I have been lucky to have several incredibly close friends, some of whom I am still in touch with. There's nothing better than the feeling of meeting a new person, and automatically clicking with them. You start thinking that this friendship will last forever. Thinking that is.

But then, change happens.

Friends get busy. Friends stop talking. Friends move away. Friends fight.

And it hurts.

Throughout the years, I have lost friends that I was close to in high school and beyond. I think it's something we all experience. It's painful, it's really painful. Sometimes, it maybe for a reason that is out of our control. Other times, it maybe because of our own actions.

I hate to admit it, but a couple of friends that I have lost in the past have been because I have pushed them away. Usually, I do this unintentionally. My social disorder may make me snap at them for no reason. Or we had had a stupid fight about something that was, most likely, irrelevant. When that happens, I immediately regret it. Especially when I think back on all the good times we had together. Sometimes I feel like I wouldn't want to be friends with me either. But I know how hard it is to forgive someone when they've hurt you, especially if they had been a trusted friend. That makes it more agonizing.

To all the friends I have ever lost, whether it was because of my actions, or not, I'm truly sorry for it. And I love you.