Sometimes I can predict if something will cause me anxiety, but sometimes it creeps up out of nowhere. Just because I can predict that a situation will cause me to feel anxious doesn't mean I can just avoid it. Most of the anxiety-inducing situations I encounter I want to overcome, like taking an exam, public speaking or going to a party. I have my own coping methods for when I feel anxious, but having someone close by for support makes a world of difference.

Not everyone will have the same experience when having a panic attack, and just because these tips work for me does not mean they will work for everyone, so it is important to ask your friend what they want you to do. When I started being honest with my friends about my anxiety and they asked how they could help, here's what I told them:

It's okay to ask me if I am having anxiety. I have learned that talking about my anxiety when I am feeling it can help ease my mind. Sharing my feelings provides a sense of relief and allows other people to better understand why I am acting the way I am. When I am at a party and someone asks why I am taking a break in the corner, I've found it is way more beneficial for me to tell the truth than try to brush off how I am feeling. It may seem weird to have this kind of honest and open discussion in the middle of a party, but hearing myself say it out loud and having someone understand how I am feeling can actually lessen the stress of the situation.

If I am having a panic attack, please don't touch me. I tend to feel very claustrophobic when I am having a panic attack. I feel like everything is closing in on me. Some people may feel comforted by a hug, but it is important to ask the person you are comforting at the moment what they want you to do. For me, holding my hand or just being a calm presence in the room is enough.

I asked that they don't leave without telling me. I depend on my friends as a crutch in situations I find stressful or overwhelming. If they leave me alone when I am counting on them, I feel completely abandoned and it increases my chance of a panic attack.

I understand it is very easy to get frustrated, especially because a lot of time I can't explain why I am feeling the way I am. It is fine to ask why I am feeling anxious because there may be something that can be done to ease my mind, but if I can't find a reason for feeling panicked then please don't push the subject.

Another bonus of telling my friends how they can help me control my anxiety is that I stopped getting anxiety about if I would get anxiety. Just knowing my friends have my back if I ever start to feel panicky is a weight lifted and eases the pressure of having to pretend that everything is okay.

I also want to emphasize please take me seriously and please don't stop inviting me places. I love spending time with my friends, meeting new people and going on adventures. I don't choose to have anxiety. I am so grateful my friends are there to support me when I need them, and I always try to be there for them in any way I can.