We’re living in a world where everything has a value. Is the price per pound cheaper at the local market or Trader Joe’s? Are the clothes at the thrift store reasonably priced for the wear and tear? We can deem something valuable or invaluable rather quickly. The bus ride is worth it when you think about the blisters you’ll prevent. Now think about you for a moment. What’s your value? I’m not talking about if other people think you’re worth your weight. Rather, I want to talk about the value we put on ourselves...or sometimes, lack thereof.

There’s a common enemy among most people. You. Me. Us.

We’ve all heard the phrase “you are your own worst critic.” We step on our own feet when we refute compliments or tell ourselves we aren’t good enough. Why do we do that? I’m guilty of it 100% and it’s 100% not OK.

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” Eleanor Roosevelt may have been onto something there. We allow ourselves to believe the hurtful things people say about us and turn it into self-loathing. “I AM too fat.” “He’s right, I’m not pretty.”

You only feel less than your best when you willingly let the bad in. It’s time to Alcatraz your sensitivity. Lock it down. You can’t let what other people say be the deciding factor on how you value yourself, bad or good. I was recently talking to a friend about my self-consciousness. She promptly told me I had nothing to be self-conscious of, that I’m a beautiful person inside and out. I thanked her but explained that if I didn’t believe that myself — if that same thought didn’t stem from my own mind — I wouldn’t be able to accept it as true.

I want to feel beautiful, but on my own accord, because our opinion of ourselves is the only one that matters.

Ask yourself these questions: What devalues you? What adds value? Becoming self-aware of your flaws AND attributes is important because if you know yourself, no one can decide who you are for you. It’s already been decided by YOU. Maybe you judge too easily — minus one point — but you’re also generous and help others in need — plus two points. Now, before you start worrying if your value is high enough, remember this: it doesn’t matter if you’re “better” or “worse” than the next person, it only matters if your value is in a place that YOU approve of. Screw the points.

Value in our society generally denotes the use or worth of something to others. Let’s change the game. Make value relative to you. And most importantly, if you want to improve your value, start by valuing yourself. Easier said than done, right? Here’s a beginner tip: smile at yourself in the mirror every morning. Be happy to see you. You’re up, out of bed, getting ready for another day. That in itself can be a task and a half, but you’re conquering it, and not only that, you’re doing it with a smile on your face. While you’re at it, tell your reflection this: “I love being me.” If you say it out loud often enough, you may start to believe it.

We were born for a reason. Whether you believe God chose you or nature chose you, you were chosen. You were given a life to live. What a shame it would be to not appreciate that. You are enough. I am enough. We are enough.

That’s not a compliment; that’s a reminder. A reminder to give yourself value.