"I am so thankful that I met you. You're my best friend. That will never change."
"I promise that I will never let you fall again."
"I promise that I will always be here for you."
Dear Friend Who Left Me,
I remember the time and the place that you said all of these things to me. I remember the feelings of joy and hurt that I had.
When I met you, it was a beautiful catastrophe that took us both by surprise. We spent every day together; we allowed all of our free time to be spent together.
And then one day... you disappeared.
You were still there. I saw you in the lunch line, in the class room, and around campus but words were no longer exchanged. I texted you that I missed you, and all that I received back was "I'm sorry."
Flash forward a couple of months, you told me you were sorry. I told you that you broke me. This was when you said to me, "I promise that I will never let you fall again." I debated hours upon days as to whether I could trust you again. I decided that I could. Because true friends do not break promises.
Back to now... I'm sitting here writing this article. Why? Because you left... again. You left me again, you broke me again, you lied to me again, and you ran again. Now I'm stuck asking myself: why wasn't I good enough? What did I do wrong? Why did you have to go? Are you just going to forget our memories?
This is what I am learning...
1. I was never the sole reason that our friendship did not work. I asked myself for days upon weeks what I did wrong, but then I realized something... I didn't do anything wrong. You were always there for me, but I was always there for you. No matter what the time, problem, or urgency was...I was there.
2. I learned to be patient. Throughout our friendship, you tested me so many times. Between canceling plans, lying to people around you, and finally walking away (twice), I learned to be patient. At first, I was being walked upon, but now I realize how to be strong.
3. I am worth so much more than how you treat me. I am intelligent and independent, and I am tired of being brought down by you and your broken promises. I am tired of asking myself why I was not good enough because in reality I am good enough.
So to the friend who walked away, I forgive you. I forgive you for lying to me. I forgive you for hurting me. I forgive you for making me question my life decisions and for making me question my self-worth. Just know that you will never have the opportunity to make me question myself again.
Finally, I would just like to thank you. Thank you for having me realize that I am enough, and that I am worthy, and that strong enough to handle what life throws at me.
I still see you around... and I still think of you. But as the great Hannah Montana once sang:
"Yesterday's gone, we gotta keep moving on. I'm so thankful for the moments. So glad I got to know you. The times that we had, I'll keep like a photograph and hold you in my heart forever. I'll always remember you."
