To that one friend that should've been more than just a friend, 

I'm sorry. I am sorry that I was too focused on a person who you knew didn't deserve me. I am sorry for stringing you along with me through this journey. I am sorry for confiding in you when I knew it could've hurt you. We were the same person. Our ambitions, our goals in life, the way we viewed the world, everything was the same. I am sorry that I was busy trying to open a door that would always be closed when you were a door that was always there and opened- until now. You see, I don't know what I truly have until the it's is gone. It is sad but it is true. The loss of you is usually when the reality of it all hits me. It's not that I didn't appreciate you when I had you, I did. But it was losing that part of you and seeing my normalcy with you change that opened my eyes.  

It hurts. It hurts knowing that you saw a future with me before but now you don't. It hurts knowing that the words you once said to me out of adoration and love are now not there anymore. That when I look in your eyes again, I wont see the feelings you once had for me. It is those same eyes I looked at for a while and had always overlooked what they truly held for me. I've overlooked a lot of things when it came to you. From me waking up to your good morning text messages to me knowing that when I sleep that around 2 in the morning you would text goodnight before you go to bed. To you always saying your greetings to me every time you saw me passing by. To you always being there when I ran to you saying he broke my heart, when little did I know the more I spoke to you of him, the more a piece of your heart for me broke.

Sometimes, I think back to that day. Sometimes its a happy memory, sometimes a sad one, and sometimes it was bittersweet. But out of all these feelings, I am sure of one feeling. Content. I am content in meeting you. I will never regret that we met. Because even though there is deep sorrow and regret in losing the love you once had for me, I gained something much more. Strength. Through your love and support for me, you taught me how to deal with life. You taught me to commit to my decisions and travel the journey it created for me. You taught me how to look back but to never go back.  You taught me to accept the path I had created for myself and learn from the mistakes I made from it. 

Through your support for me, you accepted my decisions of you. You accepted that I had chosen someone who was worse for me over you, who would have made me happy. Before it was you who had presented the open door for me and it was me who closed that door. Now, the tables had turned. It was now I who presented a open door for you in my heart and it was you who closed the door, locked it, and threw away the key.

Now, through my support for you, for you who gave it back to me so selflessly, I accept your choice. I know that my heart will always have a special place engraved just for you. But now it is truly time for us to walk the path we both made based on our decisions. Only thing is, you had already finished your journey and I am just starting mines. It's eye opening and it hurts none the less. But it was you who taught me that there is beauty in journeys, there is beauty in the decisions we make, and that there is beauty in the paths we take. So the next time as I walk this path of life, I will remember the presence of you and the feelings you had given me. I will remember the thought of you.

So to the friend that should've been more than just a friend, thank you. Thank you for telling me what I needed to know. You have allowed me to learn a lesson in life. Take everything that I have decided and use it for the better. Even though I did not see what you had to offer until it was too late, I wont make that mistake twice. 

So to the friend who will always just be a friend, when another man crosses paths with me in this journey called life, my initial thought will be of you, and how I will use you as a reminder. 

So to the friend who could've been more than just a friend and who will always only be just my friend, thank you for showing your support for me. Thank you for telling me that even if another man comes into my life that you will be there as a friend to care and protect me. Thank you for telling me that when I become happy with another, that my happiness is the only thing important to you. My promise to you is that I will not do what I did to you with him and that I will always do for you what you did for me.