I have been dreading my return home all semester, and now that it's here, I have no idea what to do. With summer plans up in the air, and the duration of my stay at home being a month to the entire summer, I don't know what these next few months are going to be like for me, and I'm talking plans for the summer and in life, which is kind of funny.

Since all of my friends are coming home, I'm sure I'll bring this up to them in our deep conversations or whatever, where we'd analyze how far we've come, how much we've grown, and all that we've achieved within these last few months, while also doing the things we used to do in high school. Oh, man, high school. Feels like ages ago, when it was literally almost a year. Summer just won't be the same as it was in high school. Something about being home and everything just doesn't quite rub me the right way.

Don't get me wrong, I love where I'm from. Little city off Highway 1, great beaches and local eateries, San Francisco a few minutes away. What more could an adventurous introvert ask for? Leaving for university, though, made me realize how weird everything would be to me once returning. My house won't really be my home anymore, and the things I once loved to do with my friends just won't be like it used to be, and that's not necessarily a bad thing. I think what I'm trying to get at is that we're slowly letting go of our youth, and I, being an incredibly nostalgic and sentimental person, am not ready for that to happen. Hell, two people I know just recently signed a lease, and I don't even have a state-issued ID. Am I growing up too slow? Are my friends growing up too fast? Or are they adulting at just the right speed?

I'm having a post-freshman-year-of-college crisis, and I wish someone would tell me what to do next. I'm just thinking about all the stuff I have to do, both this summer and sometime in the near future. The first of which is probably getting a state-issued ID. Learning to drive and getting a license would probably work best. Anyway, here is not the place to decide what to do first. Since my freshmen year just ended, I feel like I have some experience under my belt, but really, it's nothing at all. Being home just feels so strange, especially now that I'm an adult and all. Even the word sounds foreign coming from my mouth.

Adult.

What even is an adult? Me now, apparently.