The first semester is hard. It's maybe one of the biggest transitions you'll make in your life. You go from having it all figured out in high school: where things are, how to ace classes, who your friends are. Maybe you were even on top there, the big kid on campus, one of the ones everyone else wanted to be. And you had your parents to do all the things from washing your clothes and feeding you to making all the hard decisions for you. Yet, with every inch of your being you couldn't wait to get out, and come here! You couldn't wait to have the freedom and fun that comes with the college years.
Looking back on all that, do you still feel the same way? A year ago I was in your place, and to be honest, I didn't. Not always, anyway. College ended up being infinitely harder than I had ever imagined. It was nothing like the utopia of ever interesting classes, a perfect roommate, and excitement and fun at every corner that I had imagined. Sure there were plenty of oppurtunities available to have a good time, but on most nights I could barely find time to sleep, much less go to T-shirt night. I had just joined a sorority and was truly struggling to find my place in it, being a quiet girl from a small town who knew not a soul. I hated the traffic of this town, and I hated not knowing where anything was or what to do. I was struggling with time management, school was demanding way more of me than it ever had before, and I was lonely. I missed my home, I missed my friends, and I missed my family. I went home almost every other weekend, and it was always hard to make myself come back.
The worst part of it all was that I looked around and everyone else seemed to be having a grand time. Everyone else was making friends, making memories, and making this place home. I felt like I was falling behind, and missing out on the college experience altogether.
For all of you who are experiencing any of these feelings, I'm here to tell you that IT GETS BETTER. It gets so much better. Believe it or not, you actually start to figure this college thing out. You learn how to manage your time, how to study. You will start to love your major and actually care about what your doing. You will learn where everything is and all the secrets to making life in this college town easier. You WILL make friends, if you just allow yourself too. And you will have fun. You will make memories. And slowly, you'll start to miss home less and less, and accept that this is your life and its up to you to make the best of it .
And you are not alone. I found this out rather quickly. The more people I met and talked to, the more I realized that the first semester is hard on almost everyone. The feelings that you feel are normal, and you are not the only one not having a crazy wild time. To my own surprise, I found out that many of the girls who appeared to be having a blast were a lot more like me than I realized, and just dealing with it in their own way.
The key to it all is to not wallow in self pity at it all. You are here and you have every opportunity to make this your home, and to make these the best years of your life. If its school that is holding you back, take advantage of the services our school offers-see an advisor or a counselor. Do what it takes to become motivated. Find the goals you want to achieve, and the passions you want to pursue. If its fear that is holding you back, fear of putting yourself out there, or of being rejected, all I can say is to take a deep breath and face it. Life's too full of obstacles to be one to yourself.
What I really learned through the "First Semester Blues" and through escaping them was how to be comfortable with myself. I learned that I am who I am, and that I am more than I was in high school. College challenges you in so many ways, but if you make the choice to embrace it, it can bring out the very best version of you. It is exactly what you make it, so please, make it great. This experience is not supposed to make you comfortable; it is a time to get you to make your own place for yourself in the world.
