It's every girl's worst nightmare: Fortnite. The video game that's sweeping the nation, and zombifying our boyfriends.
It may seem like fun and games at first, watching those weird avatars fall from school buses and dance it out on the loading screen while your boyfriend zeros in on the screen- but it swiftly evolves into an unbreakable addiction.
Pretty soon, your boyfriend will be sneaking out of bed at night just to get his Fortnite fix before you wake up. Obviously, the game comes with an intense addiction- so how can us girls use it to our advantage?
1. Positive reinforcement
Tell your boyfriend he can play three games of Fortnite if he takes you out on a proper date! It’s a win-win.
2. Incentive for chores
If you live with your boyfriend or stay at his house often, you know boys can be really, really, gross. So, promise your boyfriend he can play his beloved game after he wipes the beard trimmings off of his sink and takes out the 4-week old trash.
Really want some Chipotle, but don’t want to get out of bed? Use Fortnite as a bribe!
If your boyfriend goes and gets you food, he can play Fornite nag-free! Little does he know you only aren’t nagging because you’re shoving a burrito the size of your head in your mouth.
Remember that rom-com you love but makes your boyfriend want to jump out a window? Tell him that if he at least pretends to enjoy the movie and holds you when you cry at the sappy HEA’s (happily ever after), then he can play his game for as long as he wants afterward.
5. Battle it out
This tactic is the most ambitious, but also the most rewarding. You beat him at his own game!
Challenge him to a Fortnite dual- if you win he never plays again, but if he wins he can play whenever he wants until the end of time. This is all or nothing, so it is essential to practice.
Do not challenge your boyfriend until you are 110% confident you will SLAY him. When you win, he will respect you and break his Fortnite addiction.
Fortnite is an epidemic, and if we don’t stop it soon we may all lose the men we love. Even though it may be impossible to stop, we can at least use these tactics to benefit from our boyfriend’s addiction.
Next time you’re sitting on the couch while your man screams at the television after losing a game of Fortnite, think “how can I use this to my advantage?” and do it!
There is no reason we should have to idly sit and watch our boyfriends' brains turn to mush when we can find ways to enjoy it a little bit.