Here's the thing about family - you don't get to pick and you don't get to choose. The people in your life who are family are blood-related to you, and that's it. Truth is, you don't have to like all of your cousins. There can be that one uncle you can't stand or that one cousin who constantly screws up no matter how many chances they are given.
But the truth is, family is family. No matter how mad they make you or how bad they hurt you, they are your cousins, your aunts, your uncles. And while it sucks that not every family speaks to each other and that cousins aren't the ones to pick you up and take you to do fun things, that is what they are, family.
My extended family is not close. We spend maybe one or two events a year together and that's it. Our conversations aren't deep and our feelings are masked by surface-level conversation. I wonder if they know I have a boyfriend or what my major is. But that's it - that's the life I was given with people who aren't close to me. We are connected through Facebook posts. People who remember my birthday when it shows up on their news feed.
And while past mistakes have greatly altered the relationships we have today, it doesn't mean it still has to effect who we are as a family today. Yes, things ended up pretty twisted. The way I feel about certain people is forever changed. But they are forever my family, and that will never change.
Surprisingly I am ecstatic when someone remembers my birthday. When they make the extra effort to ask me how school is going. But this family has been through dark things, and we will never be the same. But all I want my extended family to know is that I would do anything for them. Always.
