You're always the one who has to plan her weekend on Monday. The one who plans Christmas break with her boyfriend in August. The one who is looking for jobs before officially picking a major. The one who people ignore for asking "too many" questions. The one who gets made fun of for trying to plan an outfit for an occasion that hasn't even happened yet. The one who is crushed when things don't go according to plans.You worry that if you don't plan, it won't happen. I am here to tell you that you're not a weirdo, and you're not alone.
I have learned from my mom that there is a fine line between trying to be organized, and being controlling. People can learn to appreciate your organization, but it is very hard to love someone who constantly has to be on top of every aspect of their own life, and tries to control the lives around them too. There are several reasons why planning is important to you, because you don't like to be caught off guard. Whether it's work, parties, transportation, school assignments, or practices, you like to know what is going on, when it is happening, how you will get there and why you are doing it, at least a week in advance. You've also probably come to learn that there are very few people who share this same way of thinking. However, there are also people in your life who have accepted your somewhat neurotic nature for what it is, and go out of their way to help you to feel organized when possible. These same people also give you a reality check when you truly do need to just go with it.
Something that you should never forget: being organized and on top of things and annoyingly planning may make your life run more smoothly. However, it is okay to take a step back once in a while, and let things happen on their own. The world won't crumble around you if you pick out your outfit for a party the night of. Your boyfriend will still love you if you don't plan visits 6 months in advance. The sun will rise tomorrow if you don't know the weekend plans on Monday. Not everyone will be on the same wavelength as you. But that also doesn't mean that if you stop planning, you will be forgotten.
I think that deep down, that is my why I try to organize so much of my life. I worry a lot that if I don't reach out to people first, they won't reach out to me at all. If I don't plan trips, life will get in the way. If I don't plan my outfit, I'll end up stressing before I leave. Not many people in my life understand why I am the way I am, but I have endless appreciation for those who make the effort to understand. And I have learned that those who mind the way I am, don't matter. And the one's who do matter, don't mind.
