You may ask yourself, what does pasta have to do with moral quandary? Bad pasta may seem like a far stretch from self-realization, but people discover the truth in different ways. So in my very unique way, I had an epiphany that my morals needed to change.
Last week, I had a craving for the late-night munchies. Being ignorant of all cooking knowledge, I chose a box of four cheese pasta for my luxurious meal. I followed all the steps and put in all the effort for it to come out good. When I finalized this concoction, I smiled and had thought all of my hard work paid off.
The pasta was horrible. It was blander than a witch's skin. Even when it eventually failed me, I found a way to add a little spice to the flavorless pasta, which I unfortunately still ended up eating.
This late-night treat was a disaster. It ruined my appetite and sucked all joy from me. I worked so hard for it to be perfect, and yet nothing I did was good enough for it to be tasty. And as I was eating this gooey mess, I flashbacked to all of my past relationships, which is sad when I type it out, but not as painful as it made me feel at that moment.
I realized through pasta that in those relationships, I gave and I gave without wants or needs. My love for other people might as well have been the Pompei of affection. Because of my fears of confrontation, I never asked for more, and when I did, I was only met with heartbreak.
Thankfully I knew well enough to end those toxic relationships, but I always found myself taking the blame for what happened. But as the four cheese pasta from a week ago, sometimes proves bad pasta will always be lousy pasta. No matter the work or love you put into something, you have to look back at yourself and ask if you are receiving the same.
No person should feel second rate in any relationship. Whether it is a boyfriend, girlfriend, friend, or family member who is mistreating you, you shouldn't have to feel that way. A person has more worth than what is put upon them by others.
I feel that what most people, including myself, do not realize is that our needs have value. It shouldn't be shameful to have high standards when at the end of the day, there is only one happiness we can hold accountable, which is—our own.
Like I have said before, I gave too much of myself in relationships and wondered why that wasn't enough. If loyalty and kindness are not enough in a friendship or relationship, then it was never a strong foundation in the first place.
The most reliable foundation you can have is yourself. Bad pasta or terrible people cannot change the fact that when you first entered this life, there was only one. I'm not trying to promote a selfish person but, in actuality, a person who is not selfish with their love. I'm encouraging a person who can unselfishly love themselves as well.
So, I admit this was a lot to take from a failed meal, but I promise that all of this is written with the interest of helping others. If I can realize this truth from something barely even capable of being flavored, then I hope others can recognize this sooner from this text. Everyone deserves their true best. No one deserves to settle and let be. For the sake of you and the other person, end things before the outcome becomes more disastrous.
Instead, surround yourself with people who care about you and your well-being. Find people who center you in their thoughts and hope for the best outcome for you.
You will thank yourself in the end for being unselfish with your love.