The seasons are changing and while many college students are worried about flu season, allergies and other bodily ailments, seniors around the country are struck with another sickness: Senioritis. While the only known cure for this infectious disease is graduation, below are a few treatments that show mild to moderate improvement of symptoms.
Cure #1: Drink a beer
How to do it: Get out of class. Go to the bar. Order a pint. Scratch that. Order a pitcher. Drink it all.
Why it works: While this treatment doesn’t motivate you to do your homework or study for your exams, at least now you’re drunk.
Cure #2: Go to dinner with your friends
How to do it: Open your group text. Tell your friends there’s an emergency. Insist that they meet you at the local Mexican restaurant immediately.
Why it works: Senioritis often manifests itself in relation to your grief from moving away from your best friends in a few short months. Time together is crucial in limiting symptoms. Plus, margaritas.
Cure #3: Cry
How to do it: Pick your favorite spot (preferably private.) Sit, stand or lie down. Release a wet substance from your eyes. Uncontrollable sobbing is optional. This treatment can be executed alone or in groups.
Why it works: Modern science has yet to explain why tears help ease the pain of Senioritis, but the relief is powerful and immediate.
Cure #4: Call your parents
How to do it: Select your first speed dial. Vent to your guardians and ask for advice. Can be performed in conjunction with cures #1 and #3.
Why it works: Hearing a familiar voice is sometimes enough to calm your nervous system and ease your discomfort. Besides, they’ve already been through the struggle of growing up and somehow managed to become fully-functioning adults.
Cure #5: Take a nap
How to do it: Select a couch, bed, bench, lab table or desk. Rest your head on object of choice. Go to sleep.
Why it works: Sleep deprivation and Senioritis share many common symptoms, including fatigue, lethargy, lack of motivation, moodiness and irritability. Not to mention you can dream of the amazing places you’ll go and things you’ll do after graduation.
Senioritis is uncomfortable, annoying and depressing. Remember these tips to overcome this terrible disease and most importantly, enjoy the final phase of the best years of your life!