Going to college was something my friends and I have always talked about; it was always something that seemed so close yet so far away. I remember going through life, my career choices shifted drastically from wanting to be a radiologist once I started seeing one for my Scoliosis to now wanting to be a nurse and work with kids. I quickly learned that college was not just about my career path; it was so much more than that. The experience of living on my own, out of state, and with my best friend was one of the most challenging and the greatest ones. I learned so much in my first semester of college, lessons that I could take with me outside of a classroom. I learned that time flies. I never really appreciated the time until my last two weeks at USM came. Time is so precious, everything happens so fast in college. But the one thing we have more of in college is time. Time to have fun, study, meet new people, and find ourselves. When I look back at my mindset in September, I for sure thought this first semester would never end. Boy, was I wrong! The first semester flew by much quicker than I wanted it to.
I did not know that my experience at USM would come to an end after only one semester. That was the mindset I had just to get me through the tough times I would come to experience. After it was all said and done though, I couldn't picture myself anywhere else. I had found a second home at USM. I had the most compassionate professors and the most supportive friends. The people in Hattiesburg, MS were a new kind of what we call southern hospitality. I had never felt more accepted or happy in all 19 years of my life. It was a crazy ride, but it was a journey that I will be forever thankful for. I know a lot of people don't have the luxury of going out of state, and it is something I would recommend to anyone who has the means to. I learned that I needed to grow up fast. I was responsible for my own choices now. It's not to say that I wasn't already an independent and dedicated student, but college is definitely a different playing field than high school. There's no one holding our hands; our life is up to us.
I definitely did make the most of my first semester of college. Nothing was really hard until my health took a turn in October. My dog, Daisy, whom we've had since I was four also passed away. I was in the darkest place I'd had ever been in. I've been through a lot of bad patches with my mental health, but it was nothing like the time I had experienced in October of last year. My anxiety and depression were the worst it's ever been. I really did not see myself coming out of it this time. I thought I was doomed. I pleaded with my parents to let me withdraw and come home. My mom and I fought on the phone for a whole week because she had faith in me. I couldn't see past that darkness then, but I'm so glad my family did. My life never would've been the same if they had just let me given up. Although I struggled for months, I made it through. I missed a whole week of classes and still ended up with a 3.7 GPA. I couldn't have asked for anything more. I know that I was the one who did the work and reached out for help, but I couldn't have made it without my friends and professors. The friends that I've made at USM are ones that I wake up and thank God for every single day. They are and have been the greatest blessings in my life. I am very sad that my journey at USM has come to an end, but Hattiesburg will always have a piece of my heart.
On another note, I never thought I would have any sort of relationship with my college professors because I was always told in high school that professors don't care unless you make yourself known. My biology professor taught me so much more about myself, and she instilled in me a confidence that I was severely lacking. At first, I was extremely intimidated by this successful and blunt woman that stood before me (I mean she was working on her seventh degree, my ass was terrified!). However, throughout my hardships, she proved to be one of my biggest supporters. She demonstrated such compassion towards me, and she's someone I look up to. She's everything I want to be: strong, compassionate, and sincere. So not only did I leave USM with amazing memories and friends, I left with a sense of purpose and confidence. I don't think I would've had such a great experience anywhere else. I'm going to miss it. I already do. But I'm looking forward to what the new year brings!
