What It's Like to be First, Finest, Forever

What It's Like to be First, Finest, Forever

Deep in my heart, I love my ADPi
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I was apprehensive about going through formal recruitment at first. I had always wanted to be in a sorority, but never knew if it was truly for me. We all see the movies of the perfect Barbies with the attitudes larger than their IQs wearing barely any clothes dancing in front of a sorority house. For some that may be their dream, but that's not the type of sorority girl I wanted to be. I wanted a sorority for what it stood for. Friendship and philanthropy. I wanted to be a part of a group of girls who were down to earth, I could open up to, and be myself around. I found exactly that in Alpha Delta Pi.

So here it is, Boom Boom I went ADPi and baby here's why:

1. The "sistahhood"

Yes, the stereotypes live up to their hype. When you join a sorority you gain a bunch of new "sisters" who you will indeed find yourself calling sisters in public and when you're out. And yes you will receive strange looks. However, the word sister in relation to the amazing bonds I have made with these girls could not be more fitting. I grew up with a brother and never truly knew what it meant to have a sister until now. A sister is someone who is there for you at any time of any day with advice and ice cream. A sister is someone you share your entire closet with and flaunt the same outfits on your Instagram. A sister is someone who will laugh, cry, scream, party, dance, study, eat, breathe, sleep with you just because you love each other and because you're family.

2. The philanthropy

Ronald McDonald House Charities is everything I'm passionate about in life. Helping people, spreading happiness, and being there for people who need it. I wanted to be a part of an organization where it wasn't just about the sad pictures of our philanthropy or just about making donations and raising money, which is important don't get me wrong. But I wanted to be a part of an organization who is hands-on with their philanthropy so I can see what my service is doing for these people right away. Seeing the kids in the house faces light up when you read or sing to them makes you get that warm and fuzzy feeling inside because you know that you are helping this family even if it is only by coming to spend time with them for maybe an hour of the day. That may be the first time they've smiled in a long time and that one instantaneous moment of happiness can make all the difference in their life.

3. Personality before pretentiousness

This was the winner for me. Every single time I walked into that room during recruitment I was greeted with genuine smiles, conversations, and people. It wasn't a talk about how "pretty" I am or how "cute" my shoes were. I'll take a compliment when I'm given one, but I don't want to join an organization just to make my Instagram look better because I'll be surrounded by a bunch of pretty girls with Louis Vuitton bags. I want an organization that sees me for the person I am and accepts me for me. Within the first hour I spent with my, at that time potential, sisters I knew ADPi would be my home. I spent 20 minutes talking to a sister about how much money we spend weekly on food because we eat more than most of our guy friends. I obsessed with another one about our addiction to the Kardashian's and how badly we wanted to look like Khloe. These were the conversations that meant the most to me. Not the stereotypical compliments and awkward silence that then followed which made me feel like my hair should've been more blown out or my smile whiter.

I know all my sisters out there can relate to how proud I feel to belong to the First, Finest, & Forever. Diamonds truly are a girl's best friend.

Cover Image Credit: Danielle Vigliarolo

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I Ghosted My Old Self For 5 Months In An Effort To Reevaluate My Life

My life fell apart faster than a drunk dude approaching a Jenga stack.

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BREAKING (not fake) NEWS: It's true, you have to hit your lowest before hitting your highest.

I want to share my lowest with you, and I'm almost ashamed to say it had nothing to do with the loss of both of my parents. I like to think I handled that like a warrior.

Turns out I didn't, and the hurt I've been burying from that hit me all at once, the same moment my life fell apart faster than a drunk dude approaching a Jenga stack.

My life flipped upside down overnight back in August. I had my heart broken shattered, lost two very important friendships that I thought were with me until the end, lost my 9-5 job, my health took a hit stronger than a boulder, and I was absolutely lost. For the first time, ever, I let go of the reigns on my own life. I had no idea how to handle myself, how to make anyone around me happy, how to get out of bed or how to even begin the process of trying to process what the f*ck just happened. I was terrified.

Coming from the girl who never encountered a dilemma she couldn't fix instantaneously, on her own, with no emotional burden. I was checked out from making my life better. So I didn't try. I didn't even think about thinking about trying.

The only relatively understandable way I could think to deal with anything was to not deal with anything. And that's exactly what I did. And it was f*cking amazing.

I went into hiding for a week, then went on a week getaway with my family, regained that feeling of being loved unconditionally, and realized that's all I need. They are all I need. Friends? Nah. Family. Only. Always.

On that vacation, I got a call from the school district that they wanted me in for an interview the day I come home. It was for a position that entailed every single class, combined, that I took in my college career. It was a career that I had just gotten my degree for three months before.

I came home and saw my doctor and got a health plan in order. I was immediately thrown into the month-long hiring process for work. I made it a point to make sunset every single night, alone, to make sure I was mentally caught up and in-check at the same exact speed that my life was turning. I was not about to lose my control again. Not ever.

Since August, I have spent more time with family than ever. I've read over 10 new books, I've discovered so much new music, I went on some of my best, the worst and funniest first dates, I made true, loyal friends that cause me zero stress while completely drowning me in overwhelming amounts of love and support, I got back into yoga, and I started that job and damn near fell more in love with it than I ever was for the guy I lost over the summer.

But most importantly, I changed my mindset. I promised myself to not say a single sentence that has a negative tone to it. I promised myself to think three times before engaging in any type of personal conversation. I promised myself to wake up in a good mood every damn day because I'm alive and that is the only factor I should need to be happy.

Take it from a girl who knew her words were weapons and used them frequently before deciding to turn every aspect of her life into positivity — even in the midst of losing one of my closest family members. I have been told multiple times, by people so dear to me that I'm "glowing." You know what I said back? F*ck yes I am, and I deserve to.

I am so happy with myself and it has nothing to do with the things around me. It's so much deeper than that, and I'm beaming with pride. Of myself. For myself.

I want to leave you with these thoughts that those people who have hurt me, left me, and loved me through these last couple of months have taught me

Growth is sometimes a lonely process.
Some things go too deep to ever be forgotten.
You need to give yourself the permission to be happy right now.
You outgrow people you thought you couldn't live without, and you're not the one to blame for that. You're growing.
Sometimes it takes your break down to reach your breakthrough.

Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

My god, it's so f*cking good.

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10 Things I Learned From Joining A Non-Traditional Sorority

Joining a non-traditional sorority may not be normal but it can have its benefits.

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When I started college, I had no intention of joining a sorority. However after hearing my friends talk about the amazing time they were having in their sororities I decided to try and join one. After multiple failed attempts at joining a traditional sorority, I finally found my forever home… in a non-traditional sorority. And after talking to my friends in traditional sororities, I found there are a few things that are different.

​1.  Every time you mention being in a sorority, you get a million questions of which one and people don’t seem to understand when it is not a traditional one.

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2. You get to know all your sisters extremely well... almost too well.

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3. You don’t have to drink to have a fun time.

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4. You can’t find your sorority letters anywhere unless you special order them.

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5. It tends to be cheaper to go the non-traditional route.

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6. Big/Little is just as important for your sorority as a traditional one.

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7. There are secrets… a lot of secrets. But it is so worth it.

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8. There is very little drama but when it does happen everyone knows everything.

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9. Your sisters will become your best friends and your big/little will be even closer than that.

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10. No matter where you go you will see a sister and know her name.

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