Many people use a word that makes me cringe. I cringe because people use it in an incredibly negative way. It is used as a substitute for stupid, absurd, idiotic, uncool, illogical, senseless, dull, careless, and many, many other negative words. It is used to describe situations, it is used to describe people regardless of ability, it is used and it hurts people. It hurts my sister, who has a cognitive disability. It hurts me, because I know my sister has had to hear that word and know it is a mean, negative word. It hurts my family, who strive to make sure my sister and our friends never, ever feels like they are defined solely by this word.

It is best explained as the R word, which I will never use.

I choose not to use this word because there are other words that can be used. I have a decent knowledge of the English language and I wouldn't dream of using a hurtful word as a describing one. When I hear it, I say something. I suggest other words, I say "hey, that word bothers me, would you mind using another one. If not always, please just don't use it around me." Sometimes people agree, sometimes people are indifferent to my request, but what is most important to me is that something has been said. I may or may not have changed someone's outlook, but I have challenged them to say something else, I have offered another word as a solution, I have tried to end the use of a word that isn't used for its intention.

I think it's really important to be intentional about the words that we say. I also think it's important to say something if someone says something that is hurtful or wrong. I think that by doing this, even once a week, it can change the world. If you go out of your way to express your concerns in a respectful way, more people will catch on and have the courage to stand up for themselves and others.

I would love to challenge people who use words like the R word to work directly with the people that those words effect. If you volunteer with a group, such as Special Olympics, and assist people who have been associated with a negative word, you might see this topic from my perspective. You might see that these athletes- who work year round to compete, create friendships, work outside of their comfort zones, and hold everyone accountable for their actions- are more than just a word.

In fact, they are incredible, inspiring, amazing, hard-working, friendly, determined, kind, courageous, intelligent, and many, many other words.

So the next time you think to use a word like the R word, please think of this post and challenge yourself and others to find another word.