I’m the first one to admit that I’m stubborn and strong-willed; as I mentioned in my last article, I refuse to let people walk all over me. I don’t accept being disrespected and I will always stand up for myself. Recently, I’ve found myself thinking about women who stay in abusive relationships after encountering women who have clearly been abused but stay in these relationships. An abusive relationship, no matter if it’s physical or mental, is not a healthy environment for anyone to be in. I’ve read many accounts of women and men who have suffered at the hands of their significant other, and I can’t imagine being in a situation like that. First of all, my boyfriend respects me on a level that makes it nearly impossible to picture myself in an abusive relationship. In addition to that, I can’t imagine someone raising a hand to me and taking it. I would have my things packed and I’d be out of that situation so quickly that the other person wouldn’t know what hit them. I was raised by a single mother who taught me to stand my ground and stand up for myself; I was taught to never let someone treat me poorly. For that reason, I cannot fathom letting my significant other hurting me and allowing myself to stay in that situation. I think it's time to be more progressive as a society; it's time for a change, but where do we start?
Teaching young girls not to settle
You are far too good to let someone degrade you or hurt you. You can do way better than someone who makes you cry every night. Leave that relationship behind and move on with your life. Find the life that you deserve. As someone who has struggled with self-image for quite some time, I know that it's hard to leave someone when you don't know if you'll find someone who loves you and your imperfections. You will.
Encouraging victims to be brave
The number one reason women and men stay in abusive relationships is because they’re too scared to leave. They’re scared that their significant other will yell at them, hurt them, or worse. In a lot of domestic violence situations, there are children involved. Good parents are aware of what might happen to their children in a variety of situations, especially in worse case scenarios. But the thing is, living in an abusive relationship is the worst case scenario. If you know someone in an abusive relationship, encourage them to be brave. Remind them that they are stronger than they think and can find a way out.
Raise awareness about where and how victims can get help
I think it's time that we, as a society, quit treating these instances as if they're taboo. Victims, there are endless resources to help you through every step of the leaving process. There are law enforcement officers to help you remove your things, there are safe houses for you to go until you get on your feet, and there are counseling options for when you need help talking things out. Please remember that you are never alone.
If you find yourself or someone else in an abusive relationship, seek help immediately. If you don’t know where to start, call The National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1 (800) 799-7233. Remember, ladies: you’ve lived without him before. You can find someone who loves you and treats you with respect,and you deserve to.
