It is fairly common knowledge within the college world that finals week is probably the most dreaded time of the year. As it is also very close to Christmas, you may hear the lifeless voice of a college student drearily singing, "It's the most stressful time of the year." Here is a small chuckle for you in the midst of all the tears.
1. When the professor presents an entirely new topic the day before the final.
Of course professors are still going over new information the day before the final. How are we expected to retain all of this?
2. The standard disposition when going to a final.
Are finals really necessary? I mean failing seems like a reasonable alternative.
3. To whoever is responsible for scheduling finals the Friday before break.
One final on Tuesday, two on Wednesday and one on Friday at 3 p.m. You could have gone home Wednesday if it weren't for that one Friday final.
4. When your friends aren't stressing about finals.
Whether they don't have difficult courses or just don't care, that one friend who doesn't panic should be fired.
5. The reaction upon seeing the final exam slide onto your desk. Panic slowly transitions to melting into a puddle on the floor.
The sight of the packet itself is enough to make a grown man cry. I would rather cry on the floor and fail the exam than attempt to complete it.
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6. When literally everything is due right after Thanksgiving, because finals.
Checking your planner to see what is due when you return from Thanksgiving break and realizing very quickly that every assignment and its mother is due the day classes resume.
7. You have resigned yourself to the inevitable, finals cannot and will never go well.
It's fine. Everything is fine.
8. Stress eating.
Finals week is the prime time to eat all of the comfort foods. (And drink all of the coffee.)
9. Correcting everyone because studying for an ungodly number of hours tends to make one feel as if they know everything.
On top of being irritable due to sleep deprivation, everyone is 5x more arrogantly knowledgeable than usual.
10. When all of your friends have finished their finals and you have two more.
Okay, so basically we all agree that finals week is worse than jumping out of a plane with a malfunctioning parachute. In light of this, I wish you all the best of luck. Hydrate, eat a nutritious diet and don't stay up all night studying.
