In this day and age, technology has allowed us all to stay in constant contact, resulting in the phenomenon known as “FOMO” (fear of missing out, for those who might be behind on society’s ever-evolving slang). If you aren’t physically with your friends or even texting them, you can keep up with them through social media platforms such as Snapchat, Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook. Enter FOMO, the anxiety that your friends are having fun without you or that you are missing the best party of the year.
When we are being continually bombarded with pictures and videos of the good times everyone is having, it is easy to feel left out or stressed out. As social media seems to be shifting from a form of self-expression to a way of showing off the fun, great parts of your life, this anxiety has heightened to a cultural phenomenon with its own acronym. While I have friends who suffer from this feeling and can’t seem to miss any social event, I am proud to report I have found a way to live a (mostly) FOMO-free life.
At this point, I should probably admit that this accomplishment is a lot more feasible for me because of my personality. I am a very introverted person, a Snapchat slacker, and I love a good night in after stuffing myself with Chinese food. But, I have come to realize several things about FOMO that have helped me dodge the bullet.
First of all, 98 percent of the time, people only post exciting, funny, happy things. There’s a reason people “do it for the ‘gram,” or that on any given Friday night your Snapchat stories are littered with people spinning in selfie circles to show themselves with their 500 closest friends. No one adds a picture of themselves standing awkwardly in the corner with the sole friend they know there, or of their best friends crying and shouting at each other over something dumb. The point is, obviously everything you are seeing is filtered, literally and figuratively.
Another thing you have to think about when dealing with FOMO is whether or not you actually want to be there. There are times where I will see a picture over winter break of all of my Texas friends together somewhere. As I freeze alone up in New England, yes, I wish I were there with all of them snuggling or out to group dinners. But that Snapstory of my friends at a rave on a random Saturday night? Eh. I’ve found that making decisions based on what will make me truly happy long-term is the best way to go. Sometimes events look fun, but you might also be so much happier after a night in bed with your roommate and the ability to be a functioning human the next morning. It can be exhausting keeping up with the various social events, parties, and whatever else you are doing in college, and I think it is okay if you miss some to relax and recuperate or see people you don’t normally hang out with.
This brings me to my final, and probably most compelling, point, which is that there will be another time. There are instances where I feel a little bit bad about missing something with my friends, but the report is almost always along the lines of: “It was fun, but you didn’t miss anything.” Case in point: Hanging out with your friends will always be a good time, but most Thursday nights are pretty similar and there will be another party next weekend. Make it to the big things, but as they say, don’t sweat the small stuff.
Like most fears, FOMO only has as much power over you as you allow it to. Things always look fun on social media, even if they aren’t. If you are not feeling the vibes of something, don’t go. Your fear of missing out on one thing might be causing you to miss out on another that is just as, if not more, important (shout out to me time because it rox). Lastly, missing out on one thing is not the end of the world, because I promise there will be other times that are just as great!
